Showing results by narrator "Kieran McKenna" in All Categories

It is a fact that the average male bladder can hold approximately a pint of liquid. This quantity is somewhat greater in an Irishman, whose bladder can generally hold at least 750ml, or nearly one and a half pints. However, there are exceptions to every rule. In the case of Johnny Two Kebabs, it is well known that before having to relieve himself, he has, on occasion, imbibed up to four pints of lager. In this fifth installment of Johnny's memoirs, he relates how his "enhanced bladder capacity" helped prevent a terrorist attack by the Cornish separatist group the CNLO.

An extraordinary event: On June 15, 2011, an extraordinary event took place in Brixton, South London. An Irishman ingested two doner kebabs in one minute and 59 seconds after already having consumed 13 pints of lager. Now, for the first time, the true story of the events leading up to this feat is recounted by the protagonist, Johnny Two Kebabs. In this prequel, he relates the truth about how his exploits have ensured his place in the pantheon of characters who have shaped modern society.

In these audiobooks, Johnny exposes the truth about not only how he thwarted a Russian assassination and a series of bombings in the UK but also how he solved the infamous "Mixed Doner Murders" case. We learn not only how Johnny operates behind the scenes in his fight against evil but also about his "philosophy" and the "ethical" code by which he lives. We are reminded that Johnny is one of the great "thinkers" of our times, and that the philosophy which he espouses transcends the limits of time being applicable to all in all eras.

Who is Johnny Two Kebabs? There has been much speculation in recent years as to whether Johnny Two Kebabs really exists. Is it true that on June 15, 2011, after drinking 13 pints of lager, he polished off two doner kebabs in one minute, 59 seconds? Is Johnny Two Kebabs just an urban legend? Is the song that was written about him and for which the video appears on the internet just in the tradition of Irish blarney and storytelling?