There's white powder everywhere and Tim Allen is in a lot of trouble! What is this, an airport in the seventies?!

No. It's a seemingly lightweight Christmas movie that neither of us had ever seen, which turns out to be more depressing than watching a reindeer choke on a lump of coal.

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Tim Allen was a drug smuggler: https://faroutmagazine.co.uk/tim-allen-arrested-smuggling-cocaine/

Two hugely popular stars in a festive buddy romp?! How can this be anything less than "alright as something to stick on over Christmas," without ever exceeding that exact level of quality?!

We take a look at 'Red One', a film that's... fine.

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Variety article that mentions how Sony weren't actually banned from using Spider-Man in their Spider-Man-less Spider-movies: https://variety.com/2024/film/news/kraven-sony-marvel-movies-not-dead-1236249221/

As 'Hot Frosty' turned out to be a lot better than it had any right to be, we moved straight on to 'Madame Web.' How bad could it be?

Bad enough that it taints everything even tangentially related to spiders. Ziggy Stardust is a worse album because this film exists. You will no longer want to see things on the web because this film exists. Dakota Johnson is... No, alright, she seems like she was always awful.

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