My friend, Heather MacFayden, is a mom of four boys and I am a mom of two girls. We have two very different (but equally enjoyable) parenting experiences. We are both podcasters, but we are also real life friends. We have had many conversations over the last 10 years about the unique differences between raising boys and girls.

We decided to take our offline conversations online for you! Part 1 is over at her podcast, Don’t Mom Alone - Boys vs Girls (Part 1): The Early Years. And today, you will hear Part 2 which is all about the dating years. We even get into the anxiety that comes with dances like homecoming and prom.

I learned several things from Heather about how boys are feeling during these dating years. After our chat, I immediately went and talked to the girls about how the guys may feel used at times. They are more than a prop in a photo. I was encouraged to hear that her boys want deep conversations and interesting girls.

My goal for this conversation was to grow our understanding and empathy of the opposite gender - especially if you only have 1 gender of children in your home. Let us know what you think! What do you wish moms of girls knew about boys? What do you wish moms of boys knew about girls? Send me a DM!

In this episode, we discuss:

-Dating challenges for teens today

-Ideas on how to help boys and girls interact when curiosity begins

-How social media and phones are impacting the dating process

-Seeing behind the homecoming drama - what is going on with each gender

Enjoy!

Courtney

(02:00) Empathy in Parenting: Boys vs. Girls

(04:04) The Challenges of Modern Dating

(10:05) Navigating Social Events and Relationships

(18:08) The Impact of Social Media on Dating Dynamics

(20:21) The Pressure of Appearances in Relationships

(21:06) Navigating Modesty and Self-Confidence

(22:38) The Emotional Impact of Rejection

(23:52) Social Media's Role in Self-Perception

(24:40) Understanding Boys' Perspectives on Relationships

(25:45) The Importance of Communication and Planning

(27:39) The Dynamics of Dating and Social Expectations

(29:52) Boys' Leadership in Social Situations

(32:11) The Cost of Social Events and Expectations

(33:34) Teaching Boys About Respect and Kindness

(35:27) Building Confidence in Girls

(37:53) Encouraging Individuality in a Conformist Culture

(39:55) A Prayer for Our Children

Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess

Courtney DeFeo

Get your 2024-2025 prayer journal, A Life of Faith

Christian Parenting Christmas Gift Guide

Resources from today’s show:

HeatherMacFadyen.com

Don’t Mom Alone Podcast

The Best Christmas Pageant Ever

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

“As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend” (Proverbs 27:17 NLT)

Godly friends make us better, not out of shame or peer pressure, but out of a desire to see us faithful to God and pursuing his will for our lives. Godly friends know that God wants more for us than what the world has to offer, and so they will push us in that direction when we start to veer from the path.

Who our kids hang out with is important, iron sharpens iron and bad company corrupts character (1 Corinthians 15:33). Godly friends will help our kids grow in their faith and keep them accountable. Ungodly friends will bring them further and further from God’s truth.

So this week, let’s pray that our kids will be surrounded by true, godly friends and be a light to the friends around them who don’t know Jesus.

Jesus, I pray that ______________ surrounds

themselves with friends who know and love you. I pray they would encourage each other in faith, hold each other accountable, and that their friendships would draw them closer to you. Where there is conflict, may they be quick to show forgiveness, just as you forgave us. May _____________ be a light to those around them, always showing what a godly friend is. Amen.

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

These two episodes with Dr. David and Amanda Erickson are packed with practical ideas for the little years. Truthfully, it can be overwhelming to determine how to discipline, redirect, manage chaos while not breaking the spirit of your child. I see a cultural shift from one extreme (punishing behavior out of kids and using fear) to another extreme - letting the kids run the house with no rules.

This couple has an approach that I really believe in - they combine child development with scriptural truth. I wish I had had them when my kids were younger. They focus on “what to do” vs “what not to do” which puts an upfront emphasis on your family’s values and expectations.

My favorite part is when they talk about how to take a biblical value like “trustworthiness” and live it out in the home. As you listen to this episode, I am praying you feel equipped and not discouraged. Their way isn’t a prescribed formula - it’s a parenting philosophy that has many benefits and ideas attached to it.

When my kids were little, it was so chaotic at times and I would get so overwhelmed at my lack of parenting principles and felt like I kept messing it up. You are not alone. Don’t give up! This work and effort will pay off.

In this episode, we chat about:

• Cultural shifts in parenting styles
• How to build trust and honesty in parenting
• How to redirect behavior and manage chaos
• Ideas for discipline and consequences

Enjoy!

Courtney

Part 1

(03:03) Parenting Principles and Practical Application

(05:55) Cultural Shifts in Parenting Styles

(09:04) The Importance of Early Emotional Development

(11:53) Building Trust and Honesty in Parenting

(15:11) Consequences and Discipline Strategies

(17:53) Redirecting Behavior and Managing Chaos

Part 2

(2:30) Understanding the Impact of Fear on Parenting

(6:33) The Importance of Separation in Conflict Resolution

(9:10) Timeouts: Purposeful or Punitive?

(12:10) Channeling Physical Energy in Children

(16:20) Teaching Control Over Emotions and Actions 5

(22:00) The Role of Respect in Parenting 2

(23:48) Assuming the Best: Navigating Disrespect 3

(27:20) Affirming Positive Behavior in Children 4

Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess

Courtney DeFeo

Resources from today’s show:

The Flourishing Family - new book

Identity Simplified

The Best Christmas Pageant Ever

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org