Showing results by publisher "Tantor Audio" in Comedy & Humour

Drew Millard loves golf. As a kid, he enjoyed the game, but since college, his clubs had been gathering dust in his parents' basement. And then, a bout with depression led him back home to haul them out of the unfinished storage. It was what the doctor had ordered. In addition to medication and therapy, Drew needed to exercise. Exercise was not something he did. But golf? Sure, why not? As Drew fumbled his way through his first round in years, he discovered that sucking at golf was his new calling, one that helped him find a sense of balance and rhythm—both on the course and in his own mind.

Over half of Earth's population has left the planet, mainly as contract workers for aliens, and the homeworld is losing relevance to the emigrants. The EarthCent president takes on the task of making sure that humanity isn't permanently stuck in a rut of low-skilled labor. Can the ambassador put aside her new-found obsession with the Galactic Free Press crossword puzzle and help save the day?

i>39 Years of Short-Term Memory Loss is a seriously funny, offbeat, and irreverent memoir that chronicles the early days of Saturday Night Live and features some of its greatest personalities---Al Franken, Lorne Michaels, Dan Aykroyd, John Belushi, Bill Murray, Michael O'Donoghue, and Chris Farley.

The first carnival to take place on Union Station since humanity joined the galactic community is coming, and the ambassadors of the different species are all entered in the election to become Carnival King or Queen. It's not a job that Kelly wants, and, fortunately for her, the humans get a late start at electioneering.

We guarantee this is the only tool you need to survive the zombie apocalypse. Okay, that's not really true. But when the SHTF, you're going to want a survival guide that's not just geared toward day-to-day survival. You'll need one that addresses the essential skills for true nourishment of the human spirit.

Racer McKay is a broody bastard. From the moment I met him, he's been rude, irritable, and unbearable. And worse? He's broke. A contractor working to remodel my parents pool house for extra cash, he stomps around in those clunky construction boots with his tool belt wrapped around his narrow waist, and a chip on his shoulder. Racer McKay is also infuriatingly...sexy as hell. I want to take that pencil tucked behind his ear, and draw lazy lines slowly up and down his body all the while wanting to strangle him at the same time.

Teacher Misery perfectly encapsulates the comical misery that has become the teaching profession. Jane Morris's strange, funny, and sometimes unbelievable teaching experiences are told through a collection of short stories, essays, and artifacts including real emails from parents, students, and administrators. From the parents who blame their son's act of arson on the teacher for causing him low self-esteem to the student who offers to teach the teacher how to sell drugs so she can pay her bills, one story is more shocking than the next.

In Seven Dirty Words, journalist and cultural critic James Sullivan tells the story of Alternative America from the 1950s to the present, from the singular vantage point of George Carlin, the Catholic boy for whom nothing was sacred.

Every 20-something needs a little black book of secrets. Our 20s are filled with confusion, terrible jobs, anticipation, disappointment, cubicles, breakups, transition, quarter-life crisis, loneliness, postcollege what the heck, and moderate success sandwiched between complete failure. We need a worn and weathered guide stashed somewhere close by to help shed some light on this defining decade.

Proving that fishing is not just a part-time pursuit, At the Grave of the Unknown Fisherman takes us through a year with America's favorite fishing scribe, John Gierach, who dedicates himself to his passion despite his belief that "In the long run, fishing usually amounts to a lifetime of pratfalls punctuated by rare moments of perfection."

When Fergus tells Diana he's taking her on a flower-arranging retreat for her birthday, she should have been more suspicious. Especially when he announces that he's coming with her. After discovering the whole truth about the retreat, Diana is still considering how to murder Fergus...when one of their fellow flower arrangers is found dead - stabbed in the back with a mystery weapon. With the retreat on complete lockdown, Diana and Fergus have a mystery to solve that wasn't part of the itinerary. Will they find the killer before the clock runs out?

A sexy rockstar walking into your hotel room sounds like a dream come true. When you're in the middle of some serious self-pleasure like I was, it's a freaking nightmare. It gets worse. What I thought was my room...was actually his. I'd just given last year's hottest new talent a performance worthy of my own Grammy. Now everyone is talking about the girl who got her rocks off in Brix Wilson's hotel room. Nobody knows I'm that girl and it's going to stay that way. It's not like I'm going to run into him again, right? Wrong.

On the other side of the galaxy, the Cayl Empire has decided to wind down operations and the Stryx are planning to pick up the pieces. Kelly is tapped to host an open house event on Union Station to tempt the aliens into joining up, but does anybody other than the Stryx actually want the merger to take place?

It's 1947. War's over, cherry-print dresses, parking above the city lights, swing dancing. Beautiful, 17-year-old Violet lives in a perfect world. Everybody loves her. In 2012, she's still beautiful, charming, and surrounded by admirers. Veronica "Ronni" Johnson, licensed practical nurse and aspiring writer, meets the captivating Violet in the assisted living facility where Violet requires no assistance, just lots of male attention. When she dies, she leaves Ronni a very generous bequest - only if Ronni completes a book about her life within one year.

With outrageous anecdotes about everyone from Leonardo Da Vinci to Caravaggio to Edward Hopper, Secret Lives of Great Artists recounts the seamy, steamy, and gritty history behind the great masters of international art. You'll learn that Michelangelo's body odor was so bad, his assistants couldn't stand working for him; that Vincent van Gogh sometimes ate paint directly from the tube; and Georgia O'Keeffe loved to paint in the nude. This is one art history lesson you'll never forget!

Bill.... "Man, she's smoking hot and so adorable! There's just something about her that attracts me like gravity. Okay, yeah...maybe I shouldn't be blackmailing her into pretending to be my fiancée to fool my stubborn, moneybags father but she's perfect! And my plan is perfect too! What can go wrong?"

In No Shortage of Good Days John Gierach takes listeners from the Smokies in Tennessee to his home waters in Colorado, from the Canadian Maritimes to Mexico - saltwater or fresh, it's all fishing and all irresistible. As always he writes perceptively about a wide range of subjects: the charm of familiar waters, the etiquette of working with new fishing guides, night fishing when the trout and the mosquitoes are both biting, and fishing snobbery, a pitfall he seems to have largely avoided.

This treasury of wisdom, humor, and love is a guide for every step of the exhilarating, sometimes exasperating journey that begins with those three wonderful words: It's a boy! Its hundreds of lessons from mother to son include instilling values and confidence - knowing when to say yes, and when to say no.

A great foreword is more than just a few pages of self-indulgent frippery that comes before a book. A great foreword adds zest. It sets the stage for the page-turner you're about to open and perhaps even puts you in the locked room where a mystery happens or in the high-button shoes of a year gone by. A great foreword - sometimes - is even better than the book it precedes. So why not skip the boring actual-book part? Moving Foreword is a collection of introductions to imaginary books, written by real celebrities, comedians, musicians, and other writers with something to say.

Against all odds, Ben the Bengal cat defeated the demon dragon and sent it back to the Seventh Dimension. Consequently, Ben's nemesis, the evil warlock Astravar, is ever so slightly miffed. A demon dragon was meant to take over the realm for Astravar, while the warlock stayed in a tower with a nice cup of tea and watched the conquest from afar. But it didn't quite work that way . . .