Showing titles in Literature & Fiction

Whatever happens, don't tell anyone what you did to Bee Larkham.... Jasper is not ordinary. In fact he would say he is extraordinary.... Synaesthesia paints the sounds of his world in a kaleidoscope of colours that no one else can see. But on Friday, he discovered a new colour - the colour of murder. He's sure something has happened to his neighbour, Bee Larkham, but no-one else seems to be taking it as seriously as they should be.

Allergic to group activities of any kind, all her life Serenata has run, swum and cycled on her lonesome. But now that she's hit 60, all that physical activity has destroyed her knees. As she contemplates surgery with dread, her previously sedentary husband, Remington, recently and ignominiously redundant, chooses this precise moment to discover exercise. Which should be good for his health, right? Yet as he joins the cult of fitness that seems increasingly to consume the whole of the Western world, her once-modest husband burgeons into an unbearable narcissist.

Following his two New York Times best sellers, Brain Droppings and Napalm & Silly Putty, comes George Carlin's third audiobook, When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?, a riotous journey through the mind of one of America's premiere comic observers.

Lucy Sullivan is 26 and living it up (and occasionally down) in London. Hers is a life of quiet, undisciplined desperation. But when she and three friends visit a psychic for a bit of fun and the woman's predictions start coming true, Lucy is horrified. For the fortune-teller insisted she'd soon be married - within the year, in fact. Not only does Lucy not have a boyfriend, but the chances of getting one are looking slim. Between the bottles of wine, antidepressants and her addiction to self-help books, she's not quite ready to walk, or even stumble, down the aisle sober.

Maplemead Castle is crawling with ghosts, and the new owners need them gone. When Melody Bittersweet and the Girls' Ghostbusting Agency arrive on scene, they quickly identify the troublemakers swinging from the chandeliers...literally. A century ago, stunning trapeze artist Britannia Lovell plunged to her death, and has done every night since. But did she really just fall, or was there something more to her demise?

Enter a surreal universe where David Dickinson goes looking for weapons of mass destruction in 'Weapons Hunt', the Queen sells off the royal jewels on the QVC shopping channel and Delia Smith turns homicidal and starts cooking up the competition. Elsewhere, Anne Robinson votes off The Weakest Disciple, and Simon Schama and David Starkey battle it out - literally - in order to become television's leading historian.

When the university merged his Department of Linguistics with English, Professor Desmond Bates took early retirement, but he is not enjoying it. But his daily discontent is nothing compared to the affliction of hearing loss, which is a constant source of domestic friction and social embarrassment. In the popular imagination, he observes, deafness is comic, as blindness is tragic, but for the deaf person himself it is no joke.

When you are an inoffensive retired librarian with bitter personal experience of Evil Talking Cats, do you rescue a kitten from the cold on a December night? Do you follow up news items about cats digging in graveyards? Do you inquire into long-ago cats who voyaged around the world with Captain Cook? Well, yes. If you are Alec Charlesworth, that is precisely what you do - with unexpected and terrifying consequences.

A rampaging force of nature is wreaking havoc on the streets of Edinburgh, but has top shagger, drug dealer, gonzo-porn star and taxi driver, ‘Juice’ Terry Lawson finally met his match in Hurricane ‘Bawbag’?Can Terry discover the fate of the missing beauty, Jinty Magdalen, and keep her idiot-savant lover, the man-child Wee Jonty, out of prison? Will he find out the real motives of unscrupulous American businessman and reality-TV star Ronald Checker?

The Provincial Lady Goes Further is the immediate sequel to Diary of a Provincial Lady - and life mirrors art. Our Provincial Lady has found herself, unexpectedly, with a literary success on her hands! She is suddenly 'somebody', both in her Devonshire environs and in London, where she establishes a bolthole - ostensibly so she could concentrate on the much-awaited sequel, but also so that she can enjoy the fruits of being a best-selling author!

Newly married to novelist Rosie M. Banks, Bingo bucks the current trend by being extremely happy, although he does tend to lose his shirt on various horses. This collection of wonderfully funny stories features a cast of outrageous characters.

Tash and Jamie are back, and no one could be less pleased than her. They accidentally went to 1984 and broke it. But together they sorted out their mess. Or so they thought. Now the hapless sister and brother are back, and this time it's a matter of life or death. How far would you go to save a life? How about stealing a million pounds? Sometimes you just have to do the wrong thing. Lose yourself in Saturday Superstore, Paul Daniel's Magic Show, Sports Review of 1984 and the corridors of BBC TV Centre, this is the ultimate warning if you're ever planning a DIY heist.

In the height of summer, it’s not just holidaymakers who are drawn to the seaside town of Skegness. Desperate thieves and callous killers are searching for a hidden treasure, and they don’t care who they hurt in their quest to claim it. The most important question of all is if Sam can get to the bottom of this mystery before those closest to her are put in further danger?

Just along the coast from Penstowan, the local festival has filled the area. Former Met police officer Jodie ‘Nosey’ Parker has agreed to step in and help run the Pie Hard food truck, along with her rather reluctant fiancé, DCI Nathan Withers. As they prepare for a weekend of camping and being elbow deep in shortcrust pastry, Jodie hadn’t bargained on witnessing a fight between members of the lead band. But when the body of one of the band members is found not far from the campsite, Jodie finds it hard to believe it was an accident. Especially when the other members had so much to gain…

This is a collection of the eighth six short stories in the Caverns & Creatures series. It includes the following titles: This Poo Shall Pass, Hung Ogre, Fortune Favors the Kobold, Asses to Asses, Love on the Rocs, and The Winds of Cooper. If you've already purchased all of these books, there is nothing new for you here. If you haven't yet purchased any, you can save a few bucks by buying this collection. If you've only purchased some of these already, you'll have to do some math.

Low-level entertainment lawyer Nick Carter thinks it's a prank, not an alien encounter, when a redheaded mullah and a curvaceous nun show up at his office. But Frampton and Carly are highly advanced (if bumbling) extraterrestrials. And boy, do they have news. The entire cosmos, they tell him, has been hopelessly hooked on humanity's music ever since "Year Zero" (1977 to us), when American pop songs first reached alien ears. This addiction has driven a vast intergalactic society to commit the biggest copyright violation since the Big Bang.

All Shelley wanted on her hen weekend was to enjoy three days of sun, sea and sangria. But instead of being surrounded by the A-team of her closest friends, she somehow ends up with a Golden Girls-meets-the-Spice Girls B-list that includes her mother, a rebellious teenager and a best mate ‘on the verge’. The squabbling starts at the airport, and on arrival in Spain, Shelley barely has time to unpack her suitcase before getting an unwanted text—one that throws her wedding into doubt.

A long time ago, Emmie Blue released a red balloon with a secret message hidden inside - and against all odds, across hundreds of miles of ocean, it was found on a beach in France by a boy called Lucas. Fourteen years later, on the eve of her 30th birthday, Emmie hopes that Lucas is finally about to kiss her. She never expected him to announce that he was marrying someone else! Suddenly Emmie's dreams are shattered and the one person in her life she can rely on is slipping through her fingers. But what if Lucas isn't her forever? What if her love story is only just beginning.

Harry Flashman: the unrepentant bully of Tom Brown's schooldays, now with a Victoria Cross, has three main talents - horsemanship, facility with foreign languages, and fornication. A reluctant military hero, Flashman plays a key part in most of the defining military campaigns of the 19th century, despite trying his utmost to escape them all. If only Flashman had got on with his dinner and ignored the handkerchief dropped by a flirtatious hussy in a Calcutta hotel....

Charlotte feels shell-shocked as she takes in the scene before her. To the left is her (ex?) fiancé’s retreating figure as he hotfoots it back to civilization; in front, the crumbling Greek island farmhouse she thought was their shared dream; and just below, a goat munching merrily on her sunhat….