Showing results for "James Patterson" in Humor

When Rafe discovers that he's inherited a fortune, it's not all good news. Sure, he gets an all-expenses-paid trip to glamorous Beverly Hills...but he also has to go to school while he's in California. Blergh. And not just any school - St. Benedict's, the snobbiest of snobby establishments. You can bet your bottom dollar that Rafe doesn't exactly fit in. Toss in a ramshackle house Rafe's family has to live in before they can inherit the money and a group of bullies who make Miller the Killer look downright friendly, and this trip might be more trash than treasure.

Rafe Kane has enough problems at home without throwing his first year of middle school into the mix. Luckily, he's got an ace plan for the best year ever, if he can pull it off. With his best friend Leonardo the Silent awarding him points, Rafe tries to break every rule in his school's oppressive Code of Conduct. Chewing gum in class - 5,000 points! Running in the hallway - 10,000 points! Pulling the fire alarm - 50,000 points!

After sixth grade, the very worst year of his life, Rafe Khatchadorian thinks he has it made in seventh grade. He's been accepted to art school in the big city and imagines a math-and-history-free fun zone. Wrong! It's more competitive than Rafe ever expected, and to score big in class, he needs to find a way to turn his boring life into the inspiration for a work of art. His method? Operation: Get a Life! Anything he's never done before, he's going to do it, from learning to play poker to going to a modern art museum.

In this new middle-grade series from James Patterson, an extraordinary robot signs up for an ordinary fifth grade class... and elementary school will never be the same! It was never easy for Sammy Hayes-Rodriguez to fit in, so he's dreading the day when his genius mom insists he bring her newest invention to school: a walking, talking robot he calls E – for 'Error'. Sammy's no stranger to robots – his house is full of a colourful cast of them.

After a rough summer, Rafe is heading back to the dreaded Hills Village Middle School, the site of the very worst years of his life. And as if that's not bad enough, Rafe's learned that he's going to be held back a year unless he can prove himself on an outdoor survival excursion – complete with dangerous white-water rafting, dizzying rock climbing and military style counsellors.

David and his best friend, Michael, were tagged with awful nicknames back in preschool, when everyone did silly things. Fast-forward to seventh grade: 'Pottymouth' and 'Stoopid' are still stuck with the names, and everyone believes the labels are true. So how do they go about changing everyone's minds? By turning their misery into megastardom on TV, of course! And this important story delivers more than just laughs - it shows that the worst bullying doesn't have to be physical and that things will get better.

Georgia Khatchadorian plans to excel at Hills Village Middle School in all the places her troublemaking brother failed. She's even bet him that she'll quickly become one of the most popular girls in school. But Rafe left a big mark at HVMS, and no one will give Georgia a chance! Even worse, Rafe has sneakily signed up her band to play at the school dance, and she's terrified to embarrass herself in front of the snooty 'Princesses' who run the school and the boy who's caught her

In this seventh Middle School episode, Rafe heads back to the place his misadventures began: the dreaded Hills Village Middle School, where he's now being forced to take 'special' classes.... He also finds himself joining the school's football team - alongside his main tormenter, Miller the Killer! But Rafe has grand plans for a better year: first, he decides to start a super-secret art project that's sure to rock the school.

It's a dog-eat-dog world, and Rafe Khatchadorian is just trying to live in it. Life in middle school is finally starting to seem bearable - until Rafe spots his grandmother standing in the free-meal line at the local soup kitchen. To help earn some money for the family, Rafe concocts a brilliant plan - a dog-walking business that soon turns into a huge money-making neighbourhood empire. He'll even have extra cash to buy his own WormHole Deluxe Multi-Platform GameBox!

Jacky Hart has found a hidden talent in the performing arts, and she's a triple threat onstage! She wants nothing more than to act and sing all summer - but her parents have other plans for her. Jacky reluctantly signs up for a summer job in her resort town of Seaside Heights, New Jersey, where tourists come to enjoy the beach and fun carnival atmosphere.

A hilarious audiobook from the best-selling author of the Middle School series. Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! I’ve been waiting ages to tell my story, and now it’s finally happening! Being Rafe’s dog isn’t always easy, but it is always exciting! I’ve got so much to tell you about: the amazing Catch-a-Doggy-Bone kennel. My favourite places for hiding snacks. And my ultimate nemesis - the vacuum cleaner! All the most important parts of a dog’s life.

Jamie Grimm is a middle schooler on a mission: he wants to become the world's greatest stand-up comedian - even if he always seems to 'choke' in the spotlight. When Jamie finds out about a contest called the Funniest Kid on the Planet, he knows it's time to face his fears and enter. But are the judges rewarding him out of pity because he happens to be in a wheelchair, like his bullying cousin Stevie suggests?

Twelve-year-old orphan Max Einstein is not your typical genius. Max hacks the computer system at NYU in order to attend college courses (even though she hates tests), builds homemade inventions to help the homeless, and plays speed chess in the park. Her not-so-normal life is crazy but predictable until...Max is recruited by a mysterious organisation! Their mission: solve some of the world's toughest problems using science. She's helped by a diverse group of young geniuses from around the globe as they invent new ways to power the farthest reaches of the planet...

Living in the luxurious Arcanum building - with its interior balconies perfect for playing tag, an elevator like an iron birdcage, and quirky neighbours behind every apartment door - has always been fun and games for twelve-year-old Minerva Keen...until her neighbours start getting poisoned. Anyone could be next, and everyone is a suspect, including Minerva herself. To clear her name and help the police crack the case, Minerva starts her own detective club.

Max Einstein's typical day is not your average 12-year-old's. She teaches classes at a New York college, dodges kidnapping attempts with her best friends, goes on secret missions for her billionaire boss and has a mysterious connection to Albert Einstein. Just a day in the life of the Change Makers Institute's top agent!

After a few early glitches in their relationship, Sammy and his 'bro-bot' E are now best friends. In fact, E is such a valued member of the family that the other electronic members of the House of Robots are feeling sorely unappreciated. And when Sammy's inventor mom becomes distracted by a top-secret project, the robots soon begin to fall into disrepair. Cue a robot revolt, with the droids wreaking harmless havoc in the house!

Rafe isn't exactly considered a winner in Hills Village Middle School, to say the least, but everything's about to change: he's won a school-wide art competition, and the fabulous prize is getting to jet-set off to Australia for a whirlwind adventure! But Rafe soon finds that living in the Land Down Under is harder than he could've ever imagined; his host siblings are anything but welcoming, the burning temperatures are torturous and poisonous critters are ready to sting or eat him at every step.

Max and her friends are back and ready to take on their biggest problem yet: world hunger. While the Change Makers tackle this huge issue, Max must also avoid the evil Corp and her nemesis, Dr. Zimm. But they're not the only ones looking for Max, and as she finds herself on the run, she discovers that Einstein created a time machine. And it might give her clues to her past - her distant past.

It's not easy being Rafe Khatchadorian's sister. He's got quite a reputation around school, and Georgia's got it hard enough as is! With a super secret crush on her classmate Sam Marks, a Rube Goldberg machine challenge to dominate, and constant confrontations with vicious Missy Trillin and her evil Princess Patrol to look forward to, Georgia can't help but throw all her energy into the one thing that makes her happy: her kick-butt, all-girl rock band, We Stink!

I'm Finn McAllister, I'm a normal middle schooler, and on June sixth, I died. I know, I know - you weren't expecting me to die so soon. Me neither. But dying is just the beginning of my story. You see, now I'm a ghost! I don't have to go to school. I can play as many video games as I want. And I can try every ice cream flavour in the store. I've made a new friend, too. She's also a ghost. It's pretty neat, huh? Only thing is, I have some unfinished business. And until I, well, finish it, I can't really move on.