Showing results for "Blood" in Satire

The Blood Demon, renowned general of said civil war, was tired of all the fighting and politicking that had described the last four decades of her existence. All she really wanted to do now is to go out into the world and see the many lands from her father's stories. This is the story of what happens when you toss a (retired) war machine with somewhat lacking common sense into an unsuspecting world at peace.

Barry just wanted to get through life. Working a useless job by day, drinking at a forgotten bar by night. It was a miserable cycle, but one he grew attached to over time. Then Barry died.

Avery Doyle loves vampires; he's read every novel, seen all the movies, and researched the folklore. When his first one-night-stand, Caroline, turns out to be a true vampire on the run, he jumps at the chance to leave his ordinary life and join her as a "child of the night". The honeymoon ends, however, when Caroline's brutal Creator Sebastian enslaves them on his island estate and Avery must confront the dehumanizing reality behind his dreams. In order to survive, Caroline and Avery take their place as servants in Sebastian's household during a gathering of the most powerful vampires on Earth.

There are 47 bars in Magenta that sling their swill to the 80-odd thousand inhabitants and I know every stool, table, couch, and urinal in every one of'em. It’s my business to know. The Garden of Eden was as slick as a silk sheet sliding on sweat-soaked skin. It brought originality to the word "sin" that even Webster couldn’t have kept down to less than a chapter.