Showing results for "América" in Humor

Coke and Pepsi McDonald didn’t want to jump off a cliff. They didn't want to get hit by poisoned darts from blowguns either. And they certainly don't want to get locked in their burning school, thrown into a pit at the top of a sand dune, or drowned in a vat of liquefied Spam. But what are you supposed to do when you’re being chased across the country by your insane health teacher and two guys in bowler hats who are trying to kill you? One thing's for sure, it'll be a snap for Coke and Pep to write their essays on "How I Spent My Summer Vacation."

Will the twins make it back home to California in one piece, or will they fall off the top of the Golden Gate Bridge? It's all coming to an end with this fifth book in the Genius Files series. You'll have to listen to believe it!

Coke and Pepsi McDonald never asked to be geniuses. They never asked to get lowered into a basket of boiling french fries, either. And they certainly never asked to be frozen in soft-serve ice cream, stampeded in a wild stadium riot, or kidnapped on a high-speed roller coaster. But that's what happens when a red-haired villain named Archie Clone is chasing you across America. This just might be the most dangerous road trip in history - and the most awesome!

The wackiest road trip in history continues in book four of the New York Times best-selling Genius Files series, following twins Coke and Pepsi as they dodge villains and visit weird-but-true landmarks from Texas all the way to Roswell, New Mexico. With the real-kid humor that has earned him millions of fans around the world, and featuring all-new weird-but-true locations around America, From Texas with Love is absolutely batty!

Just when they think they are safe, theMcDonald twins are chased by an evil Elvis impersonator, trapped in a pool of flesh-eating soda pop, nearly pulverized in a giant shredder, and crushed in a turbo-charged carnival ride. Worst of all, no one believes them! Will they make it out alive? Will they ever find out who's really after them? All bets are off in this explosive third book in the Genius Files series.

From heroic George Washington to the dastardly Richard Nixon, the oval office has been occupied by larger-than-life personalities since 1789. The position comes with enormous power and responsibility, and every American president thus far has managed to achieve great things. However, the President of the United States is only human - and oftentimes far from perfect. While some men suffered through only minor mishaps during their time in office, others are famously remembered for leaving behind much bigger messes.

After visiting Boston, Judy Moody's in the mood for liberty and freedom - freedom from her parents' rules and her pesky little brother, that is. But Judy's plans to declare independence, just like the Patriots did in 1776, wind up getting her into hot water. For sure and absolute positive, the founding fathers never had problems like hers! Will Judy be able to prove, once and for all, that she's ready for a bit more independence?

In New York Times best-selling author Dan Gutman's all-new series, which blends fascinating real history with an action-packed adventure, four very different kids are picked by a mysterious billionaire to travel through time and photograph some of history's most important events. This time, Luke, Julia, David, and Isabel are headed to the deck of the doomed Titanic. Their mission? Capture a shot of the sinking ship, then come right back.

At the first annual "states party", Virginia and Idaho hatch a plan to swap spots so each can see another part of the country. Before the party is over, all the states decide to switch places. In the beginning, every state is happy in its new location. But soon things start to go wrong. Florida, who switches spots with Minnesota, is freezing in the frosty northern climate, and Minnesota hasn't brought sunscreen and is getting an awful sunburn.

This rocket-paced follow-up to the Newbery Medal–winning novel Dead End in Norvelt opens deep in the shadow of the Cuban missile crisis. But instead of Russian warheads, other kinds of trouble are raining down on young Jack Gantos and his utopian town of Norvelt in western Pennsylvania. After an explosion, a new crime by an old murderer, and the sad passing of the town’s founder, 12-year-old Jack will soon find himself launched on a mission that takes him hundreds of miles away.

Ellis, Dante, and Popcorn Bob are on an important top-secret mission in America. (Ellis’s dads are there too. But they don’t know about the mission.) When Popcorn Bob last escaped the clutches of Coraline Corn (the evil owner of Popcorn & Co.), she said that there are more live popcorn kernels in America—just like Bob! Bob can’t wait to meet his family. If they exist.

Historians still agree about the date of Columbus' voyage. But did this European adventurer discover America? We now know that certain explorers from other parts of the globe set foot on American shores long before 1492: and that others may have done so. And "discovery" takes on a different meaning when the new land already has people living in it.

The trouble started when Pepe the parrot fell in love with . . . a CAT! Hoping to win her paw, he invited her to his house for dinner. But within moments of arriving—with a gobble and a gulp—Carina swallowed that love-sick parrot whole! And he was just the appetizer!

What if Jack and Jill had been playing on a nice soft sand dune instead of that treacherous hill? And suppose Mary's pet wasn't really a lamb. What if Mary had a little...clam? Those questions - and more - are gleefully answered in Mother Osprey: Nursery Rhymes for Buoys & Gulls. This collection retells Mother Goose rhymes and celebrates America's coastlines and waterways - from sea to shining sea.