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This week Brian and Brian discuss philanthropy, philistines and Dr Phil. They draw the conclusion that the world is neither flat nor round but more obelisk shape due to the number of chromosomes now available at Walmart.

Oprah Windfrier makes a surprise appearance and wrestles Megan Markmurkmucksen in a vat of goat semen whilst the Archbishop of Lawnton Heights blessed the whole affair with a suspicious bulge in his cassock.

On a sombre tone the Brians bury Barry in a shallow grave after a sewing accident, dig him back up and bury him again a week or so later.

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In this episode The Brians reveal the best way to deal with all the shit presents and resolutions that clog up a fresh new year. Charles Darwin summed it up best when he said "Throw that shit in the ocean!"

The truth about wombats is discussed and we learn how to make barometric pressure your friend.

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This week the Brians recall the trials and tributaries of Asstralia's northern capital territory place, the majestic and sweaty City of Charles Darwin. Once prized as the home of dirt, gravel and roadkill; this plucky little back passage has been through the wars over the years. Literally!

Bombed by Japanese interior decorators in WW2 and blown down, sucked off and spat out by the aptly named Cyclone Dick Tracy in 1974 and again in parts of 1978 or 9, Charles Darwin Town remains an historic landmark and a reliable place for Brian to be run out of by the locals.

On a side salad, Barry gets his arm torn off in a Christmas sandwich accident and God refuses to pay out the insurance policy, the bugger!

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Wrapping up this years events like a stinking bag of prawn shells in a Murdoch newspaper, Brian and Brian unravel the magic and mystery of the festive seasons with all the understanding, warmth and spottiness of a leper with his (or her) scabs torn off.

The somewhat true tale of the not-so-baby Jeesus and some of his henchman is explained in simple language for simpletons and smart asses alike....and speaking of asses, the annual donkey salesman of the year award is announced.

No spoilers but Barry has been drunk ever since the award ceremony at the Chermside Heights Abattoir.

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This week the Brians realise that jail time is much easier these days now one doesn't have to bend over to pick up the soap. Handy pump packs of Diddy Oil is now being introduced to the Professional Corrective Services division of P Diddler Enterprises. The Diddler himself is overseeing the introduction of this eagerly awaited product to inmates and wardens alike.

Nothing says I love your body more than a good diddling in the shower with thugs, murderers and the incarcerated innocent; like a firm rubbing down with the personally tested Diddy Oil. Now infused with radioactive goat semen for that slightly unnatural glow.

On a more serious note, this week Barry gets to test drive his own Diddy Oil after an altercation with a bicycle and a midget; whilst Bevan is sworn into Donald Trumph's new wardrobe as Secretary of What Are You Lookin' At Cunt!

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This week the Brians reflect on what the upcoming Awstrarliun election means for the average Antipodean Pedestrian and how The Right Dishonourable Peter Dutton, Minister for Castrating Everything will inevitably win; leading to mass "What the fuck have we done!", which will also inevitably follow.

On a lighter note....Donald Trump....aaaagggghhhh!

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It's been a funny old week for Brian as the mighty Aardvark 2400 cross-crisses the only bit of the southern hemisphere that doesn't have rabies. Rabid people of dubious morals and intent maybe; but as far as you can throw a herring.... no actual live cases of rabies.

Brian on the other hand is staying behind at Herring Central Headquarters to make paper planes and enjoy some welcome nudity.

Many people have been asking where the Brians get their thermo nuclear urine-proof clothing these days. We tell them that with the new Seniors App downloadable from The Siamese Herring and Nigerian Attorney at Law Store, is the only way you can stay up to date with what's what and what's not.

On a less or more or less salient point, the Herring Evangelical Motorhome Tour of Greater Australia Heights is nearly sold out. Special Reserve tickets are now on sale at Brians@Notascam.com.hey.oi

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This week the Brians jump on a horse called Umerica as the Trumpet's new administrangulation reveals it's ultra-dynamic plans to make the NRA head of The Department of Education. The NRA Child Centre for the Mutilation and Desecration of the Human Race promises to be the cornerstone of Governor Elon Musk's experimental Cloning and Super Race Program. Nice one Musky!

Also, Brian announces his bold plans for a nationwide evangelical blitzkrieg. This monumental....and we do mean mental, endeavour; will involve hundreds of...no thousands of litres of leaded diesel, powered motor thingys and aggressive toileting procedures.

On a sombre note, Barry returns home after a nice drive deep into the outback country stuff. The bastard!