The Disorienting Dilemma

By: Podstarter
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  • Summary

  • Two longtime friends, both Canadian – one black, one white, and both men – explore what it looks like to adopt the mindset of an inclusive society. Instead of asking, ”How do we get there?”, Jake and Chris discuss what does it look like to act as if we’re there already.
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Personal Success Social Sciences
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Episodes
  • Bridging Divides: Lessons in Belonging from a Baltimore Neighborhood

    Bridging Divides: Lessons in Belonging from a Baltimore Neighborhood
    May 8 2024
    In the heart of West Baltimore, a neighbourhood grapples with the profound impact of systemic inequities that have shaped its trajectory for generations. Amidst the vacant lots and dilapidated houses lies a community striving to reclaim its narrative and forge a path towards resilience and renewal. A recent immersive volunteer experience in this neighbourhood offers a glimpse into the complex web of social issues at play and the transformative power of intentional action, reflection, and belonging.The legacy of discriminatory practices like redlining reverberates through the streets of West Baltimore, manifesting in stark disparities in housing, infrastructure, and opportunity. Redlining, which denied home loans and insurance to residents based on race, relegated minority communities to areas deemed "high risk," setting the stage for disinvestment and decline. The scars of this systemic injustice are visible in the abandoned properties that dot the landscape - a staggering 15,000 vacant houses in various states of disrepair.Yet amidst this challenging backdrop, seeds of hope and resilience take root. Organizations like Parity are working to rehabilitate vacant houses and make them available to the community, recognizing the transformative potential of homeownership in breaking the cycle of generational poverty. By partnering with volunteers and leveraging resources, they aim to chip away at the daunting scale of the housing crisis, one house at a time.For the volunteers who stepped into this neighbourhood, the experience was a profound lesson in the power of proximity and perspective. Confronted with the stark realities of systemic inequity, they grappled with their own assumptions and biases. The act of working alongside community members, passing buckets of debris and tearing down walls, became a metaphor for dismantling the barriers that divide us. In the process, they discovered a shared humanity and a sense of collective responsibility.The volunteer experience also highlighted the importance of agency and ownership in driving meaningful change. Rather than simply participating in a pre-scripted program, volunteers were encouraged to take initiative, problem-solve, and contribute their unique skills and perspectives. This shift from passive participation to active agency fostered a deeper sense of investment and empowerment, as individuals recognized their capacity to make a tangible difference.However, the true impact of the volunteer experience extended beyond the physical rehabilitation of houses. It lay in the conversations and connections forged between volunteers and community members - the sharing of stories, struggles, and aspirations. One particularly poignant exchange with a long-time resident shed light on the profound challenges faced by the community, from the absence of elder wisdom to the erosion of trust and cohesion.The resident's words served as a powerful reminder that true transformation requires more than bricks and mortar. It demands a fundamental shift in how we relate to one another, how we build and sustain communities of care and support. It calls for a willingness to bear witness to the pain and resilience of others, to listen with empathy and act with compassion.This is where the concept of belonging emerges as a vital thread in the tapestry of social change. Belonging is not merely about helping or fixing; it is about co-creating a space where everyone feels seen, heard, and valued. It is about recognizing our interdependence and shared stake in the well-being of our communities. When we approach challenges with a mindset of belonging, we open ourselves up to the possibilities of collaboration, mutual understanding, and collective healing.The volunteer experience in West Baltimore also underscored the critical role of restorative justice in addressing the harms inflicted by systemic inequities. Restorative justice seeks to repair relationships, restore dignity, and promote accountability through dialogue and collaborative problem-solving. It recognizes that true justice is not solely about punishment or retribution, but about creating the conditions for individuals and communities to thrive.In the context of West Baltimore, restorative justice might look like bringing together community members, volunteers, and stakeholders to have honest conversations about the impact of redlining and disinvestment. It could involve collectively envisioning a future where vacant houses become homes, where streets are safe and vibrant, and where every resident has access to opportunity and resources. Restorative justice demands that we grapple with the uncomfortable truths of our past and present, while also daring to imagine and work towards a more equitable and just future.Ultimately, the volunteer experience in West Baltimore serves as a microcosm of the larger social movements and transformations that are needed to address systemic inequities and build resilient communities. It ...
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    57 mins
  • The Complicated Emotions of Leaving People, Places, and Projects

    The Complicated Emotions of Leaving People, Places, and Projects
    Apr 17 2024

    In this episode, Jake shares a disorienting dilemma he experienced recently when visiting a place that used to hold massive importance to him. The emotions this left him with were unexpected to say the least. Chris joins in on the discussion, connecting Jake's story to one of his own - a camping trip from his youth that went unexpectedly (and dramatically) awry, and how the feelings he experienced then were reflected in a recent trip to the hospital.

    Through these anecdotes, discussions on neuroscience, and insights into human behaviour, the guys dive into the subject of change. Most notably, the internal changes that occur when leaving an important person, place, or project that we've invested ourselves into.

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    42 mins
  • The Pain of Exclusion and the Fragility of Social Identity

    The Pain of Exclusion and the Fragility of Social Identity
    Apr 4 2024
    In this deeply personal episode, Chris and Jake explore how even small moments of exclusion can leave lasting scars by threatening our sense of belonging and social identity. They connect a story from Chris' past to the recent Republican response to the State of the Union, showing how identities can be built up but also quickly torn down by social groups.The Power and Peril of Social IdentityOur identities are significantly based on and empowered by the groups we belong to, according to social identity theory. We derive self-esteem from our group memberships and the status of those groups. "Prototypical leaders" who embody a group's norms are seen as representatives, gaining influence. But this also makes identity precarious - the group can withdraw their endorsement at any time.Senator Katie Britt carefully followed the playbook of how she was supposed to present herself as a young female conservative leader. But Republicans immediately mocked and criticized her speech, undermining her identity as a rising star. As Chris puts it, "I can go from prototypical leader, hey, we're gonna do this. We're gonna make this happen. Everybody rally around to 'Yeah, but you're not invited to the pool party.' And it's just it's a it's a it's a weird human dynamic that we have."A Formative Moment of ExclusionOver 20 years ago, Chris was excited to continue hanging out with a volunteer group in Halifax and attend a pool party. But then he was told "Oh, not you Chris. You're not invited." This moment still sticks with Chris today. It tapped into deep fears of not belonging."Somehow I got 'Oh, not you, Chris. Not your this. You're not invited.' I felt really like that made sense. Like I could see it made sense. But it still affected me and I have thought about that often on for years about why I wasn't invited and why I cared one way or the other. Like why did that bother me?"Chris was in his early 30s at the time, married with kids, while the others were in their early 20s. They saw Chris as more of a "fun boss" than a close friend to invite along. The age and life stage difference, while not huge, was enough to classify Chris as outside the in-group.Missed Opportunities for Bridging DividesJake found himself caught in the middle, between his friendship with Chris and this younger friend group. He saw it as a chance to vouch for Chris and bring him into the in-group. "I could have protest I could have I did nothing. Yeah. Let it Yeah. Okay. I guess, because I wasn't it wasn't my house. It wasn't my pool. I was tagging along."But Jake went along with it and didn't speak up, something he later regretted. It was a missed opportunity for what the two call "social bridging" - building connections across boundaries. Jake admits he was afraid of losing his tenuous status in the group if he challenged them.Reflecting on Exclusion, Identity and InclusionThe pain of exclusion, even in small doses, comes from it threatening our social identity and sense of belonging. Our identities feel solid but are actually quite fragile, since they depend on recognition from groups. "Ingroups" and "outgroups" form easily and can lead to:Favoritism toward one's ingroupsStereotyping and denigration of outgroupsExclusion of those seen as outsidersLeaders and influencers can use their social capital to build bridges between groups. But it requires bravery to stick your neck out and bring others in, risking your own status. Ultimately, fostering inclusion means expanding our circles of who we see as part of "us."By reflecting on past hurts and missed opportunities, we can gain insight into how to do better moving forward. Recognizing our own experiences of exclusion can motivate us to ensure others feel embraced. And when we witness someone being left out, we have a chance to be the one to invite them in.Key ConceptsSocial identity theory - Developed by Henri Tajfel and John Turner, it says our sense of self significantly comes from our group memberships, or social identities. This drives group comparison and competition for self-esteem.Ingroup vs outgroup - Ingroups are social groups we identify with, while outgroups are ones we see as outside our circles. This classification often leads to ingroup favoritism and discrimination against outgroups. Ingroup bias is likely a hardwired human tendency.Prototypical leader - A group member who best embodies the group's attributes, goals and identity. Due to being seen as extremely representative of the group, they gain influence to determine group norms and membership.Social bridging - The act of building connections and relationships across different social circles or groups. Social bridges allow for improved intergroup contact, empathy, resource sharing and conflict reduction.Additional Resources to UseSocial Identity Theory - Simply Psychology - This resource from Simply Psychology explains the concept of Social Identity Theory. It discusses how our sense of self is influenced by our group memberships ...
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    51 mins

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