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• Melissa and Evan share their past experiences with unspoken agreements in relationships
• Passing off anxieties to partner to resolve insecurities
• Finances are a common reason for divorce
• Unspoken agreements utilized in an attempt to resolve attachment trauma
• Fawning to prevent from abandonment, maladaptive self-preservation
• Mind reading
• We need to deal in realities, not “shoulds”

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• "Christian Counseling" directly opposes the ACA Code of Ethics
• Counselors' political biases creating division with clients
• The new-age drama of "right and wrong think"
• Therapists should not be truth-seekers
• The importance of sitting with clients that have different ideologies
• Melissa shares about her love of Ricky Martin
• Why is the counseling profession becoming a banner flag for social justice and advocacy?
• Approaching a client relationship similarly to visiting a foreign country
• We are entering the client's world, not inviting them to ours

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• Faulty torture tactics in the Iraq war
• Carl Jung's Devouring Mother Archtype
• Barriers when applying boundaries to parents
• Parents of children with addiction feel a sense of closeness in crisis
• Internal conflicts that occur when experiencing incongruence

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Please reach out via email or social media if you'd like to participate in our FREE wellness audit where we take a brief snapshot of your presenting problems and offer insight into establishing possible new strategies of engaging with self and others.

• Wellness Audit
• Transference begins even in the initial consultation with a client
• Operating from “control pattern"
• Ineffectiveness of solely practicing Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Rogerian Therapy
• The importance of conflict in therapy
• Therapy should go far beyond the clients’ presenting problems
• They “why” isn’t as important as the “what”

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Evan and Melissa explore how clients have been their greatest teachers. Topics also include:

• Negative attribution styles
• Evan and Melissa discuss what they view as their greatest accomplish with a client
• Sexual trauma response of eliciting “testing behaviors” to possible aggressors
• The power of entertaining the clients presenting problem
• Exploring with the client: What are we contracting to do?
• Evan talks about this upcoming climbing trip

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Evan and Melissa discuss the nature of recovering from codependency, its benefits, and challenges.

• Finding recovery from codependency or other mental health struggles
• CODA a 12-step recovery program for people recovering from Codependency
• Recovery is not an arrival
• Complications of personal growth journey
• The risk of outgrowing relationships
• Stages of change

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Evan and Melissa discuss the vagus nerve and its implications in emotional regulation and treatment.

• 3 stages of polyvagal theory
• Technology outrunning our limbic systems evolution
• Anxiety tension and fear are attempts to intellectualize feeling
• Feeling avoidance compared to a nicotine craving
• Neurolinguistic programming

Melissa also is gracious enough to offer her charts to any of our TMAYM supporters! Feel free to reach out to our email contactus@tellmeaboutyourmother.run

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Evan and Melissa explore the often deductive and maladaptive conceptualizations pop psychology shares on social media and its negative consequences.

We plan to make this a series since there's a lot of material to cover. This episode focuses on social media reels that are giving advice as to what types of texts to send to your partner that has an anxious attachment style.

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Have any questions or insights about this episode? Reach out to us at contactus@tellmeaboutyourmother.run