Many sex tips focus on either specific techniques or exploring kinks to improve your sex life, but that’s not what really matters. Studies have shown eight specific elements of great sex: presence, connection, intimacy, communication, authenticity, bliss, exploration, and vulnerability. This is empowering because it means literally everyone has the ability to be a great lover; it just takes time, energy, and attention.

Hear it Here - https://bit.ly/ScienceOfAttraction

Show notes and/or episode transcripts are available at https://bit.ly/social-skills-shownotes

Learn more or get a free mini-book on conversation tactics at https://bit.ly/pkconsulting

#CompleteAcceptance #Connection #Intimacy #Presence #Vulnerability #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #TheScienceofAttraction

The Power of E.Q.: Social Intelligence, Reading People, and How to Navigate Any Situation By: Patrick King

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https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0C3CC2RM3

Your success in life will depend on how good you are with people. Sorry, that's the harsh truth.

But the good news is that this is a trainable skill - and this book is an amazing start.

Make a smashing first impression and make people crave your presence.

The Power of E.Q. is as practical as a book can be. You will get techniques to use immediately on the people around you, and you will suddenly realize how much you have been missing! You will gain a deep understanding of emotional intelligence and the small signs behind what people are thinking and feeling. Imagine how much more easily you could make friends or befriend business partners if you could analyze them better.

Read and analyze people with such stunning accuracy that they will be shocked.

Patrick King is an internationally bestselling author and social skills coach. His writing draws of a variety of sources, from scientific research, academic experience, coaching, and real-life experience.

Find the shortcuts to connecting with people in record time.

conversational intelligence and how to empathize in 4 steps

how to step outside of your own perspective and read the emotions of others

cold reading and being an expert at finding "clues" about people

understanding emotions and how to label yourself and others

how high-quality questions will make you seem like a mind reader

#DrDurvasula #PatrickKing #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #ThePowerofE.Q. #HandlingBigEgos—IncludingYourOwn #

Easily listen to Social Skills Coaching in your podcast app of choice at https://bit.ly/social-skills-home

00:06:04 How to Use Funnel Questions

00:08:26 Here's a summary of How To Ask Funnel Questions

00:11:50 How You Structure a Question Matters

00:15:14 Rhetorical Questions

00:16:09 To conclude, here are a few Tips For Using Questions

00:17:03 How to Be a Truly Effective Listener

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• One of the easiest ways to connect with another person is to just ask questions. The right questions help you gather more and better-quality information, build stronger connections with others, inspire trust and liking, learn, and help other people learn, too.

• Closed questions (those that have very short or one-word answers) can be used to confirm your understanding, make conclusions or summaries, or set the tone and scope of a more formal or structured conversation. However, they can kill a conversation and make it feel interrogatory.

• Open questions (any possible answer) allow you to probe for depth and can keep a conversation lively and open-ended. Use both in the “funnel question” technique, which probes for information down a narrowing path of increasing detail, starting broad and progressively becoming more specific. Start with open questions, then drill down for more detail as you go, eventually reversing the funnel if necessary.

#FunnelQuestions #Openended #Probing #Question #Rhetorical #EffectiveListener #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #HowtoSpeakEffectively #Communication’sMostUnderratedSkill

Easily listen to Social Skills Coaching in your podcast app of choice at https://bit.ly/social-skills-home

Hear it Here - https://adbl.co/3N9lsjI

00:00:34 Part one of the Friendship Mindset is the Art of Active Listening.

00:06:12 Pay Close Attention

00:09:17 Be Mindful of the Little Things

00:10:52 Help People Think Out Loud

00:16:03 Restate

00:17:16 Summarize

00:18:10 Reframe

• Give the gift of solid, respectful attention at all times. Listen generously, as though you are prepared to hear the value, the sense, and the meaning in everything you hear. Don’t let your desire to seem like a good listener get in the way of actually being one. Let people know you are listening with small verbal and nonverbal gestures.

• Try not to let your own perspective impair your ability to understand somebody else’s. Start from a position of ignorance and work your way up to real understanding, rather than making assumptions about what other people’s experiences mean.

• To be a good listener, practice restating what you are told, paraphrase that content in your own words, summarize what you’re hearing in a useful way (or else condense things by labeling the core emotion), then potentially reframe the story or gently suggest something new if this might help solve a problem or create an emotional resolution. Do this without assumptions, biases, or interpretations, but with a mind to truly understand the other person’s point of view.

#BeMindful #Concentrate #GoodListener #Listening #Mindful #Paraphrase #PayCloseAttention #Reframe #Restate #Summarize #Paraphrase #Summarizing #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #MakeFriendsEasily #TheFriendshipMindset #THEARTOFACTIVELISTENING #PatrickKing

Easily listen to Social Skills Coaching in your podcast app of choice at https://bit.ly/social-skills-home

00:01:43 How to Create Healthy Boundaries

00:03:29 How to Set Boundaries

00:14:24 Use DEARMAN for Polite Requests and Refusals

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• Human beings are complex, and not all problems and conflicts can be solved by simply heaping on more and more empathy and understanding. Emotional intelligence means having boundaries that are not too permeable or too rigid.

• Take the time to understand who you are, what you want, and what is unacceptable to you, then take responsibility for communicating that message clearly and directly to others. Whatever type of boundary you are setting a limit for (time, money, emotional energy, etc.), make sure that you are willing to follow through, and not use boundaries to passively control or manipulate others.

• The DEARMAN acronym can help you make requests and refusals while staying polite. It stands for describe, express, assert, reinforce, mindfulness, appear confident, and negotiate. Emotionally mature and intelligent people take responsibility for how they navigate social spaces, and know that their needs and limits are always changing and under constant renegotiation. Real life is messy sometimes; be flexible and open to accommodation.

#AppearConfident #Ask #Assert #Asserting #Boundary #Communicate #Confident #Conversational #DBT #DEARMAN #Decide #EmotionWheel #EQ #HealthyBoundaries #Mindfulness #Negotiate #Relationship #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #ThePowerofE.Q. #OwnYourLimitsWithHealthyBoundaries

Easily listen to Social Skills Coaching in your podcast app of choice at https://bit.ly/social-skills-home

00:00:48 Judi Brownell from Cornell University

00:01:07 Here are the components of Brownell’s model: H: Hearing

00:03:01 U: Understanding

00:05:01 R: Remembering

00:06:48 I: Interpreting

00:08:33 E: Evaluating

00:10:57 R: Responding

00:15:29 Don’t Be a Conversational Narcissist!

00:17:52 Reframe the Way You Understand the Purpose of Conversation

00:18:52 Don’t Jump Ahead

00:20:04 Avoid Advice

00:21:12 Stop Centering Yourself

00:23:06 Watch Out for Passive Conversational Narcissism, too

00:23:56 What If They’re the Conversational Narcissist?

00:26:37 The HURIER method asks us to Hear, Understand, Remember, Interpret, Evaluate, and Respond, in that order.

00:26:53 Avoid being a conversational narcissist, who is someone who uses conversation to gain attention for themselves, rather than connect with others, share, or learn.

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• Good listening is a collection of different skills: hearing, understanding, interpreting, and responding. The HURIER method asks us to Hear, Understand, Remember, Interpret, Evaluate, and Respond, in that order. Remember that listening is active and includes both verbal and nonverbal material.

• Avoid being a conversational narcissist, who is someone who uses conversation to gain attention for themselves, rather than connect with others, share, or learn. Reframe the way you understand the purpose of conversation and understand that it’s not about you or your ego. Avoid giving advice, interrupting (or thinking about what you want to say), or centering yourself in the dialogue. Similarly, don’t be afraid to disengage when you encounter a conversational narcissist.

#AvoidAdvice #Brownell #CharlesDerber #ConversationalNarcissist #CornellUniversity #Derber #DontJumpAhead #HURIER #Narcissist #PassiveConversationalNarcissism #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #HowtoSpeakEffectively #TheHURIERMethod

Easily listen to Social Skills Coaching in your podcast app of choice at https://bit.ly/social-skills-home

00:01:48 Karen Huang and colleagues

00:05:35 Chunking Up and Down

00:18:15 When to Chunk Up

00:19:13 When to Chunk Down

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• Research suggests that talking about yourself makes you a little less likeable, while asking questions makes you a little more likeable. Open-ended and follow-up questions especially showed the greatest relationship to likability. People like those they believe are genuinely hearing them, seeing them, and reacting to them.

• Questions that chunk up or down allow you to vary the degree of detail at which you present or request information. Both approaches have their uses, but it’s about balance, variety, and aligning with the other person. Become curious about where a current conversation is and whether it might need more chunking up or chunking down.

#Chartrand #Chunking #ChunkingUp #GeorgeAMiller #KarenHuang #Lacan #Lacanian #RussellNewton #NewtonMG #PatrickKing #PatrickKingConsulting #SocialSkillsCoaching #MakeFriendsEasily #Question-Asking