This week we are uncovering what must be the two-dozenth secret conspiracy at the FBI while we discuss “Nothing Important Happened Today II”! We’re talking how you just can’t tell your coworkers to zip it and cooperate, Brad and his squeaky chair, whether or not Scully is on quaaludes, how instantly hateable Brad is, and how the writing staff were really proud of their little tagline. We discover that Doggett can apparently just un-fire himself, wonder whether Skinner is going through nanobot withdrawal, laugh at the nightmare fakeout, and realize that of course Kersh is a hat guy. Phrase of the week: A little bureaucratic pimp job. You can’t just say that, Doggett!

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This week we are taking a swim with Lucy Lawless while we discuss “Nothing Important Happened Today I”! We’re talking Doggett and Reyes tummy sleepers lore, how much Cary Elwes is struggling his way through that American accent, how disgusting it is to stick your nasty fingers into your whiskey glass, how HR uses Mulder and Scully as a cautionary tale of workplace romance, and that The Lone Gunmen were let out of their government dungeon. We get scared of all the first names being tossed all over the place, celebrate Rowdy Held the baby actor, wonder what it is about slicked-back blonde hair that turns you evil, and have a heated debate over whether or not Scully called her baby Sweet Willy. Mulder’s a deadbeat dad, Scully abandoned Reyes in her hour of need and kicked Doggett out of her life, and Skinner is being a whiny loser about breaking into a top-secret facility. Tough look for our heroes this week!

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This week we are doing something a little different and taking a look back at Season 8 and The Lone Gunmen as a whole! We argue about whether or not sloughing off all your skin would be relaxing or not, add Chris Owens to the Famous Chris ranking (naturally), wonder if we need to do a T2 bonus episode, discuss the pros and cons of Mulder and Scully as parents, and have a very controversial ranking of “Patience”. We rank the episodes, recommend a few The Lone Gunmen episodes, answer emails and questions, assemble a bingo card/drinking game for listening to our podcast, and each assemble our own Topgolf Fantasy team and pit them head to head. It gets pretty intense.

Note: Check out our Topgolf Fantasy team poll on Instagram on December 5!

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