Welcome back to another solo episode with you, me, and the mic. In this episode, I will be talking about what is the outcome when we use these tools to connect the kids because there is no one way to build and sustain a relationship. We will also talk about how to use the cross-connecting model to make a difference and build a community in the classroom.

Let’s jump into this episode and dig in more about cross-connecting and the outcome of the tools that we use to build connections with kids.

[00:01 - 01:35] Opening Segment

• I want to invite you to our Virtual Conference 13th -14th July 2021, with an amazing lineup of speakers.
• To find out more about the conference visit www.rclfirst.com.
• I introduce the topic of today’s episode.
• What is the outcome when we use these tools to connect the kids?

[01:36 - 07:36] The Outcome Of Relationship Building Tools

• Three areas of cross-connection.
• Student to student
• Student to teacher 
• Teacher to student 
• Through that cross-connection model, we could truly build community.
• What is your As card in building relationships with kids?
• Think about your Go-to building relationship activity and your thought process.
• Aspects to consider when choosing the activity 
• Does it provide the opportunity for students to learn about each other?
• Does it create the opportunity for you to learn about your students?
• Does it create the opportunity for students to learn about you?
• I share an example from a brown bag activity 
• Be intentional about your tools and the outcome.
• Are students going to learn about each other during this activity?
• Is the teacher given an opportunity to learn about the students?
• Are we intentionally telling the teacher to share and that they should share during these tools?
• We always have to incorporate all voices in the classroom.
• I challenge you to make sure that when you build a relationship in the classroom, incorporate your voice and let the student feel and appreciate your contribution to their community.
• Final words.

Tweetable Quotes:

• “We have to think about building community; student to student, student to teacher, and teacher to student, it is an outcome that we believe is making a difference in our practices and our tools.” -  Kevin Curtis.
• “Cross-connecting will truly help you build classroom community in the class no matter what tool you are using .” -  Kevin Curtis.
• “Always incorporate all voices in the classroom.” -  Kevin Curtis.

Visit www.Rclfirst.com to join the Educator Circle Calls that happen three times a week! 

Join our Facebook Group for more stories and communication about our work. 

Want a FREE download of 25 GTKY questions? Visit www.rclfirst.com and sign up for our newsletter!

Welcome back to another solo episode with you, me, and the mic. In this episode, I will be talking about questions, specifically how we can question as tools to build and sustain relationships, especially with our students. Not only by focusing on the questions but also the answers that will shape the conversation.

Let’s jump into this episode and dig in more about questions and connections.

[00:01 - 01:30] Opening Segment

• I want to invite you to our Virtual Conference 13th -14th July 2021, with an amazing lineup of speakers.
• To find out more about the conference visit www.rclfirst.com.
• I introduce the topic of today’s episode.
• Question sets the tone for the conversations.
• The question starts the conversation, but the answer shapes the conversation.

[01:31 - 05:30] Questions to Connections 

• I talk about being a question sewer and question business.
• GTKY questions as the tools to build and sustain relationships in the classroom.
• Use questions to get to know your students and also think about their responses.
• Have the conversation shape around the right questions to find more similarities and build connections.
• Let the answer be genuine, real, and authentic by asking thought-provoking questions.
• Share your favorite questions with us on our RCLP Facebook Group or any of our social media pages.
• See links below.
• Final words.

Tweetable Quotes:

• “Over the years, we have determined that the question in itself when we use these tools sets the tone for the conversations.” -  Kevin Curtis.
• “The question starts the conversation, but the answer shapes the conversation.” -  Kevin Curtis.
• “Let the answer be genuine, real, and authentic by asking thought-provoking questions..” -  Kevin Curtis.

Visit www.Rclfirst.com to join the Educator Circle Calls that happen three times a week! 

Join our Facebook Group for more stories and communication about our work. 

Want a FREE download of 25 GTKY questions? Visit www.rclfirst.com and sign up for our newsletter!

Welcome back to another solo episode with you, me, and the mic. In this episode, I will be talking about the pathways of training, the concept of consequences with grace, and understanding that life is far from black and white.

Let’s jump into this episode and dig in more about leading and responding with grace.

[00:01 - 02:40] Opening Segment

• I want to invite you to our Virtual Conference 13th -14th July 2021, with an amazing lineup of speakers.
• To find out more about the conference visit www.rclfirst.com.
• I introduce the topic of today’s episode.
• Two pathways of training in The Relationship-centered learning in National Educators for Restoratives Practices.
• The evolution of gray developed from the concept of proactive vs. reactive.
• Gray are consequences with grace.

[02:41 - 08:24] Consequences with Grace

• The background of today’s topic and how I came up with this concept.
• Adults who fail to give grace to kids
• Life is far from black and white.
• I break down the analogy of speeding.
• The slow down period and the shift of behavior. 
• Experience accountability.
• Understand that we are all going to make mistakes.
• Leading and responding with grace
• Black and white are consequences without grace, gray are consequences with grace, and everybody wants black and white until you need gray. 
• Final words.

Tweetable Quotes:

• “As you grow up and go up in leadership of the educational system, it gets grayer and grayer.” -  Kevin Curtis.
• “As long as everything to you and your world is considered black and white, then you see no need for gray until you need it.” -  Kevin Curtis.
• “Black and white are consequences without grace; gray are consequences with grace. And everybody wants black and white until you need gray.” -  Kevin Curtis.

Visit www.Rclfirst.com to join the Educator Circle Calls that happen three times a week! 

Join our Facebook Group for more stories and communication about our work. 

Want a FREE download of 25 GTKY questions? Visit www.rclfirst.com and sign up for our newsletter!

Welcome back to another solo episode, Mindset Monday, with you, me, and the mic. In this episode, I will be talking about the power of words, how it is affecting our expectations towards our students, and the understanding not to expect students to always be perfect.

Let’s jump into this episode and dig in more about the power of words.

[00:01 - 02:00] Opening Segment

• I want to invite you to our Virtual Conference 13th -14th July 2021, with an amazing lineup of speakers.
• To find out more about the conference visit www.rclfirst.com.
• I introduce the topic for this episode.
• The power of words, between ‘students and kids’

[02:01 - 06:41] The Power of Words

• The transformation of philosophy.
• It is normal for kids to make mistakes; it is normal for students to make mistakes.
• Two completely different connotations and expectations between the word ‘students’ and ‘kids.’
• The correlation between academics and how students behave
• Not expecting students always to be perfect.
• The grace and understanding that kids and even adults are going to make mistakes. 
• How we handle and label those mistakes.
• Final words.

Tweetable Quotes:

• “I don't want perfect students; I want students to grow, reflect and own and be accountable for their voice and their choice.” -  Kevin Curtis.
• “When we look at our students, no matter what their age is, they are kids, and when we look at kids, we need to understand they are not going to be perfect.” -  Kevin Curtis.
• “If we continue to think of students, not as kids, we are going to continue to struggle in giving grace, understanding expectation, and giving kids the opportunity to be kids.” -  Kevin Curtis.

Visit www.Rclfirst.com to join the Educator Circle Calls that happen three times a week! 

Join our Facebook Group for more stories and communication about our work. 

Want a FREE download of 25 GTKY questions? Visit www.rclfirst.com and sign up for our newsletter!

In this episode, I get to interview the superintendent of Westwood ISD, Wade Stanford. Wade is not just full of knowledge and experience but also vulnerable. We will be talking about so many twists and turns of vulnerability, listening to other stakeholders, and utilizing those processes with staff and students. From this interview, I hope we can challenge ourselves as leaders in education to think differently, put those thoughts into action, and change the thought platform we start to use.

Let’s dig in and learn more about his inspiring experience and how to lead with authenticity, transparency, and vulnerability.

[00:01 – 18:30] Opening Segment

• Let’s welcome Wade Stanford to the show. 
• The Flip 5! We take turns asking five GTKY questions.
• Want a FREE download of 25 GTKY questions or more info about us? Visit www.rclfirst.com.

[18:31 – 30:10] Building Genuine and Sustainable Connection

• The 2nd Restorative Practices Training conference.
• Wade shares his thoughts and opinions about the Restorative Practices Training conference.
• The internal drive of peace.
• Passion and conviction piece that causes people to move from their hearts not out of fear or compliance.
• Build genuine connections as an ordinary person regardless of your title.
• Thought process when dealing with the simple referral.

[30:11 – 42:29] Leadership with Authenticity, Transparency, and Inclusivity 

• The transparency and authenticity in creating an impactful genuine connection.
• The inclusivity piece.
• The significant role of telling our story and communicating it out.
• Get the right people at the table to make progress.
• How to make collaboration to find the best approach.
• Buy-in vs. ownership.
• The importance of gathering and creating a safe place for people to share their thoughts

[42:30 – 55:54] The Thought Exchange 

• Wade talks about the thought exchange platform.
• Building connection and trust with the staffs
• Closing the loop with vulnerability and authenticity.
• The importance of remembering where we come from.
• Create power and ownership amongst colleagues.
• The formula for high-level instruction on the campus.
• Thought exchange in the classroom between students and teachers.
• Utilize student and adult voices.

[55:55 – 01:20:19 ] Power and Permission

• SNAO (Strategies, needs, and outcomes) model.
• Wade shares his plan with the thought exchange platform next year.
• Conversation before consequences.
• The power and permission. 
• Breaking barriers down.
• Being comfortable with sharing your struggle.

[ 01:20:20 – 01:23:04] Closing Segment

• I share my takeaways from the conversation.
• Wade shares his final words.
• Final thoughts and words of advice

Tweetable Quotes:

“Passion and conviction piece that causes people to move from their hearts not out of fear or compliance.” –  Wade Stanford.

“Consequences and discipline will not change behaviors, but only through practices and reflections will create changes.” –   Wade Stanford.

“When we bring people that aren't close to the problem, they tend to see the best solution..” –  Wade Stanford.

Connect with Wade via email to

In this special episode, I interview my co-founder Denise "Circlemamma" Holliday, and I sit down for a special segment called Restorative Real Life Moments. Denise and I had a conversation about an incident where another dog attacked her dog in the neighborhood by her mom's house, and we started talking about how she reacted vs. responded. We also talked about what she needs to repair hard, what some of those conversations look like, how did she pause along the way to even get to the point where the story ended. We are trying to do this Restorative Real Life Moments as frequently as we can to share who we are as human beings and the work we are trying to do and how it’s working and transforming us, but yet we are still humans.

Let’s dig in and learn more about reacting vs. responding.

[00:01 – 11:14] Opening Segment

• I share a brief introduction to today’s special segment. 
• Restorative Real-Life Moments.
• Let’s welcome Denise "Circlemamma" Holiday to the show. 
• Denise shares the 4 Fs and back story surrounding what happened to her and her dog-brother ‘Powder.’ 
• Denise talks about her reaction and responds when the incident occurred.
• The pause and moment of reflection when she got to the right state of mind.

[11:15 – 24:10] Reacting Vs. Responding

• We can get it wrong all day long, and we make decisions based on emotions that we call reacting vs. responding.
• Reacting from an emotional space.
• It would be up to us to find out how to make it right.
• Denise talks about the transformation trigger to her thought pattern and process of realization.
• The pause of clarity and reflection moment.
• The absence of rational thinking.
• Denise shares how her neighbor responded that helped her to get into her rational thinking and empathy.
• Patient and empathy.

[24:11 – 29:10] The Fix that Was Needed

• Denise shares about the fix and what needed to happen to make this right as possible.
• The plan of making sure it will never happen again.
• Denise talks about how her neighbor fixed the problem and stayed true to what he said he would do.
• We are all human; we do not have to be perfect and always be the right ones. But it’s about trying to make it right when the opportunity is there.

[ 29:11 – 36:02] Closing Segment

• Denise talks about the takeaways that she had grown and going from this event.
• I share my takeaways from the story.
• Self-growth and self-understanding.
• Responding more to things than react out of emotion
• Final thoughts and words of advice

Tweetable Quotes:

“We can get it wrong all day long, and we make decisions based on emotions that we call reacting vs. responding.” –  Denise "Circlemamma" Holliday.

“We are all human; we do not have to be perfect and always be the right one. But it’s about trying to make it right when the opportunity is there.” –   Denise "Circlemamma" Holliday.

“I am going to live my best life when I can respond more to things than I react to them out of emotion.” –  Denise "Circlemamma" Holliday.

Connect with Denise via email to circlemamma@nedrp.com. 

Visit www.Rclfirst.com to join the Educator Circle Calls that happen three times a week! 

Join our Facebook Group for more stories and communication about our work. 

Want a FREE download of 25 GTKY questions? Visit

Welcome back to another solo episode, Mindset Monday, with you, me, and the mic. Within the last few episodes, I realized that I continue to use the same phrase about actively listening to someone from their behavior towards us within the last few episodes. So in this episode, I will be talking about active listening and increasing the awareness of red flags. 

Let’s jump into this episode and dig in more about listening to someone’s behavior.

[00:01 - 01:33] Opening Segment

• I introduce the topic for this episode.
• Listening for a message within someone’s behavior 
• I share some quotes regarding behavioral listening.

[01:34 - 06:25] Listening to Behavior

• Missing the red flags of a relationship in the way someone treats us.
• Reflect and ask yourself what happens when something goes awry.
• Become more aware of any message within someone’s behavior 
• The importance of taking another perspective from a third party.
• The tendency to excuse and tolerate someone’s behavior because of your feelings, biases, or beliefs.
• Final words.

Tweetable Quotes:

• “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” -  Maya Angelou.
• “There’s a message in the way a person treats you. Just listen.” – Unknown.
• “People always tell you who they are. You just have to listen.” - Clay Jensen (a character from 13 reasons why)

Visit www.Rclfirst.com to join the Educator Circle Calls that happen three times a week! 

Join our Facebook Group for more stories and communication about our work. 

Want a FREE download of 25 GTKY questions? Visit www.rclfirst.com and sign up for our newsletter!

In this episode, I interview Veronica V. Sopher, the Chief Communications Officer of Fort Bend Independent School District. Veronica and I will be having a wonderful conversation about the art of communication, especially what leaders need to consider when they lead meetings and be in public or events. In addition, we also talk about what parents need to consider when communicating with the district, the power of social media, and many more. We will discuss not only the art of relationships but also the art of communication. 

Let’s dig in and learn more about becoming a better listener and connecting better across generations.

[00:01 – 07:25] Opening Segment

• Let’s welcome Veronica V. Sopher to the show
• The Flip 5! We take turns asking five GTKY questions

[07:26 – 20:57] The Power of Non-Verbal Communication  and Social Media

• Veronica shares a brief introduction about who she is and what is her current position
• The power and importance of Non-verbal communication 
• Veronica talks about her experience in working on non-verbal communication with leaders
• The face leaking
• The role and guidance of dealing with Social Media for school leaders
• The responsibility to engage folks in a positive way
• Veronica talks about her experience in dealing with the breach of unwanted posts on the social media of educators or schools
• The support of the other staff in protecting one another
• The speed up communication on campus and a bigger reach because of social media

[20:58 – 35:10] The Art of Communication 

• Why sometimes kids have difficult times trusting adults today, compared to 20-30 years ago
• The ability to quickly question their information and verify it themselves 
• Veronica shares some tips to consider when communicating with the school district and wanting to know more information
• Veronica talks about making your message so clear; it can not be misunderstood
• Have the core at the core
• Relationship and communication
• Veronica shares her opinion on building a community that is filled with an honest, open flow of communication and grace

[ 35:11 – 39:27] Closing Segment

• Veronica shares her final words and a closing message
• I share my takeaways from this interview
• Veronica shares her experience in building trust and communication with the parents
• Final thoughts and words of advice

Tweetable Quotes:

“Non-verbal communication is probably more powerful than verbal communication.” – Veronica V. Sopher

The district is starting to see how important communication is to the success of the district and the expectation of the parents.” –  Veronica V. Sopher

“Communication is part of building the relationship and the way to express it.” – Veronica V. Sopher

Connect with Veronica via email to vsopher@hotmail.com. 

Visit www.Rclfirst.com to join the Educator Circle Calls that happen three times a week! 

Join our Facebook Group for more stories and communication about our work. 

Want a FREE download of 25 GTKY questions? Visit www.rclfirst.com and sign up for our newsletter!