In this episode of Make More Love, Ellen Dorian explores the impact of betrayal on relationships and how it undermines trust, presence, and purpose—the key drivers of a passionate partnership. Ellen introduces the S*H*I*T Model, a practical framework designed to help listeners process betrayal, rebuild trust, and move forward, whether that means repairing the relationship or deciding to let it go.

Part 1: Betrayals vs. Disappointments

• The difference between disappointments and betrayals: Disappointments don’t usually erode trust, but a pattern of consistent letdowns can lead to betrayal.
• Betrayals involve forethought and perception, making them uniquely damaging to trust and connection.

Part 2: The S*H*I*T Model

• Phase 1: Crap or Get Off the Pot – Decide if you’re ready to rebuild trust or if it’s time to let go.
• Phase 2: Climb Off the Crap Pile – Let go of resentment and unrealistic expectations that keep you stuck.
• Phase 3: Compost That Crap – Turn lessons from betrayal into personal and relational growth through actionable steps.

Part 3: Practical Advice

• Learn how to let go of the “resentment story” and societal fairy tales about relationships.
• Focus on personal growth, rebuilding trust incrementally, and creating a shared relationship model.
• When necessary, seek guidance from a coach or counselor to work through unresolved issues.

Key Takeaways:

1. Not all letdowns are betrayals. Disappointments hurt but don’t usually erode trust, while betrayals strike at the foundation of the relationship.
2. The S*H*I*T Model helps you decide if you’re ready to rebuild trust. It walks you through a process to determine whether you’re prepared to do the work.
3. Decisiveness and letting go come first. Commit to staying or leaving, and release resentment before addressing the betrayal itself.

Ellen created a free downloadable worksheet to guide you through the S*H*I*T Model. Use it to figure out where you stand and the steps you can take to move forward. If you need personalized support, book a free Relationship Reset Call with Ellen at relationshipresetcall.com.

Next week, Ellen will wrap up the Avoiding Divorce series with a discussion on regaining alignment in your relationship and how to create a shared vision for the future.

Ellen invites listeners to share their thoughts, either in the P3 Insider's Community or directly with her via email. Or, for one on one brainstorming on a specific situation, listeners can set up a time on Ellen's Calendar for a free Relationship Reset Call.

All links can be found below.

S*H*I*T Model Worksheet: https://drive.google.com/file/d/12u7PnW5OSu-ac28ckuoDCoryDW-Zl-vv/view?usp=sharing

The Make More Love show is for information and entertainment purposes only, and reflects the personal opinions and experiences of the host and guests. It is not a substitute for professional advice or guidance in specific situations.



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