Why Won't You Apologize? cover art

Why Won't You Apologize?

Healing Big Betrayals and Everyday Hurts

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Why Won't You Apologize?

By: Harriet Lerner PhD
Narrated by: Cassandra Campbell
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About this listen

Renowned psychologist and best-selling author of The Dance of Anger sheds new light on the two most important words in the English language - I'm sorry - and offers a unique perspective on the challenge of healing broken connections and restoring trust.

Dr. Harriet Lerner has been studying apologies - and why some people won't give them - for more than two decades. Now she offers compelling stories and solid theory that bring home how much the simple apology matters and what is required for healing when the hurt we've inflicted (or received) is far from simple. Listeners will learn how to craft a deeply meaningful "I'm sorry" and avoid apologies that only deepen the original injury.

Why Won't You Apologize? also addresses the compelling needs of the injured party - the one who has been hurt by someone who won't apologize, tell the truth, or feel remorse. Lerner explains what drives both the non-apologizer and the over-apologizer, as well as why the people who do the worst things are the least able to own up. She helps the injured person resist pressure to forgive too easily and challenges the popular notion that forgiveness is the only path to peace of mind. With her trademark humor and wit, Lerner offers a joyful and sanity-saving guide to setting things right.

©2017 Harriet Lerner. All rights reserved. (P)2017 Simon & Schuster
Communication & Social Skills Conflict Resolution Marriage & Long-Term Partnerships Psychology Social Sciences Sociology Witty Science Communication
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What listeners say about Why Won't You Apologize?

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Very good read

Nice book with good examples and suggestions one of those book one has to read and put into practise for the results.. not easy though

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars

I wish I've heard this book years ago!!

I wish I've heard this book years ago!! Highly recommended. Listen to it while painting the house and made the chore a revealing experience :)

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Extraordinary, transformational!

A life changing book, gentle, packed with wisdom, provoking deep reflection and bringing clarity to previously puzzling situations and behaviors.

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1 person found this helpful

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def recommend

i started this book to help me move on from a relationship where i didnt get an apology i thought i deserved,but it ended up being very informative ,clarifying lots of things about recieving and giving apologies , worth the readd for sureee

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Great, great, great

Another great book by Harriet Lerner. I’ll be listening many times over- I wish I’d been taught this stuff years ago.

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Well done and thankyou

This book is fabulous. I love Harriet's work and this one does not disappoint. once you know the difference between a genuine apology and a fake one you won't be able to unknow that. so don't read if you don't want to learn this stuff. lol.

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Dealing with difficult conversations

Insightful discussion of what to say and how to speak to the hurt caused. No excuses.

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This book is AWESOME!!!

I highly recommend this book. It has helped me a lot to make sense of a bad relationship and broken relation with family members. i have been recommending this book to a few people. I have learnt a lot!!!

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A restricted view of healing potential

I enjoyed the book but found that there were areas where this author simply had ignored or not experienced the power of rounded healing and forgiveness on an intensified journey of self emotions and self forgiveness... followed by outward forgiveness and empowerment.

It was an interesting book but these pages of shortfall really disappointed me sadly.

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Repeat from other books

If you’ve read any other Harriet Lerner books, you will hear a lot of repeats.
Good book but would probably benefit someone who hasn’t read the dance of anger

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1 person found this helpful