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No More Mr. Nice Guy
- A Proven Plan for Getting What You Want in Love, Sex and Life (Updated)
- Narrated by: Dr Robert Glover
- Length: 6 hrs and 49 mins
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Summary
“One of the best books I’ve ever read on men’s emotional health and development.” Mark Manson, author of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck and Models.
“I have read every self-help book out there, but this was the first that put everything together in a way that made perfect sense to me.”
“Every page of my copy of No More Mr. Nice Guy is highlighted in yellow. How did you know me so well?
A Nice Guy, according to Dr. Robert Glover, a pioneering expert on the Nice Guy Syndrome, is a man who believes he is not okay just as he is. He is convinced that he must become what he thinks others want him to be liked, loved, and get his needs met. He also believes that he must hide anything about himself that might trigger a negative response in others.
The Nice Guy Syndrome typically begins in infancy and childhood when a young boy inaccurately internalizes emotional messages about himself and the world. It is fueled by toxic shame and anxiety. Rapid social change in the late 20th century and early 21st century has contributed to a worldwide explosion of men struggling to find happiness, love, and purpose.
The paradigm of the Nice Guy Syndrome is driven by three faulty covert contracts. Nice Guys believe:
- If I am good, then I will be liked and loved.
- If I meet other people’s needs without them having to ask, then they will meet my needs without me having to ask.
- If I do everything right, then I will have a smooth, problem-free life.
The inauthentic and chameleon-like approach to life causes Nice Guys to often feel frustrated, confused, and resentful. Subsequently, these men are often anything but nice. Common Nice Guy patterns include giving to get, difficulty setting boundaries, dishonesty, caretaking, fixing, codependency, people-pleasing, conflict avoidance, passive-aggressiveness, unsatisfying relationships, issues with sexuality, and compulsive masturbation and pornography use.
Since the publication of No More Mr. Nice Guy in 2003, hundreds of thousands of men worldwide have learned how to release toxic shame, soothe their anxiety, face their fears, connect with men, embrace their passion and purpose, and experience success in work and career. These men have also learned to set boundaries, handle conflict, make their needs a priority, develop satisfying relationships, and experience great sex.
This process of recovery from the Nice Guy Syndrome allows men to move through:
- Depression
- Social anxiety and shyness
- Codependency
- Low self-esteem
- Loneliness and hopelessness
- Feelings of failure
- Lack of confidence and purpose
- Compulsive behaviors and addictions
- Feeling stuck in life
Contrary to what the title might seem to imply, No More Mr. Nice Guy does not teach men how to be not nice. Dr. Glover shows men how to become what he calls Integrated Males. Becoming integrated does not mean becoming different or better. It means being able to accept all aspects of oneself. An integrated male can embrace everything that makes him unique - his power, his assertiveness, his humor, his courage, and his mission, as well as his fears, his imperfections, his mistakes, his rough edges, and his dark side.
If you are ready to get what you want in love, sex, and life, No More Mr. Nice Guy will show you how.
What listeners say about No More Mr. Nice Guy
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- NC
- 19-03-18
Awesome
Such a useful book. Highly recommend it for any man looking to be more of man.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 28-04-19
Good.
I don't agree with some parts, but overall this book is amazing and really helped me improve my life.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Sunil
- 06-07-19
Good listen. Helped me a lot
The book was scarily accurate to what I experience in life and has helped me to think about actions I can take to overcome them. Well worth a listen for any man experiencing difficulties in life.
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- Amazon Kunde
- 25-08-21
Make yourself a mental point of origin
Great book with a step by step approach of how to get rid of nice guy attitude. Compared to my friends I would not consider myself 100% a nice guy, I found nethertheless some points that spoke to me personally. The message is clear – you should make yourself a mental point of origin. Trying to please other people makes you miserable and is not working in the end.
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- Todd
- 07-05-19
Fantastic read for all Mr.Nice Guys out there!!
loved it. I relate so much to this book! go read now, especially if you feel at a loss and don't know why
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- Anonymous User
- 30-04-19
a brilliant self help book for men,this book helps
this book has helped me to realise what I need to do with my life and how to deal with women and work situations
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- Jonatan a.
- 25-03-24
the storis from the groups
I would recommend this to anyone on a journey for improvement and self appreciation, it's an exceptional book.
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- Tom
- 21-07-24
Felt like it was written for me
I loved this book and listened through within a few days. I am now going to listen back through to further study and begin in the exercises. Very well put together and clearly much time has been put into its content. The author speaks to you like an adult male and does not sugar-coat issues. It honestly felt like it was written for me as the person described throughout is who I have u fortunately become. My sincerest gratitude to the author and I cannot recommend highly enough.
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- Dave Blundell
- 08-09-18
The best book a man can read!
Where do I start? After trying to find a cure for struggling with life and love. Having read books on self help, spirituality and the meaning of life this book diagnosed me 100%. Yep I am a Nice Guy! This was like reading my own life story.... because it was! I read this book open mouthed and amazed, after 50 years of hell I now know the problem that has been my constant curse. I owe Robert Glover a debt of gratitude, because now I can hopefully become a "Man" and not a "Nice guy" anymore. If you're a male out there struggling in life and love and never getting to where you think you deserve to be you have to read this book. In fact I think every man needs to read this book to stop and to halt the nice guy/half man plague that has afflicted the male population. BUY THIS BOOK YOU WILL NOT BE SORRY 10/10
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3 people found this helpful
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- Jasbir A.
- 11-02-18
Awesome book
it's a must read for every guy. it's a shame I didn't come across his book earlier.
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1 person found this helpful