Nasty Women

𝙒𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙣 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙢𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙫𝙚𝙨 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙙 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙞𝙣𝙨𝙪𝙡𝙩𝙨 𝙛𝙡𝙪𝙣𝙜 𝙖𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢 𝙗𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙨𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙣𝙚𝙙 𝙗𝙮 𝙖 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙩𝙪𝙨 𝙦𝙪𝙤 ... 𝙜𝙤 𝙗𝙖𝙘𝙠 𝙖𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙜𝙚𝙣𝙚𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙤𝙧 𝙩𝙬𝙤 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙢𝙮 𝙜𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙢𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙜𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩 𝙜𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙢𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙗𝙚 𝙡𝙖𝙗𝙚𝙡𝙡𝙚𝙙 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙘𝙝𝙚𝙨
(Laura Lam)
-
Nasty Women is an anthology of essays/stories from women writers, voicing their views and opinions on what it is to be a woman in today's society.
Every woman knows what it's like to be spoken down to, to be spoken over, and to be generally disregarded as not having something valuable to contribute in any given situation. Often, when we speak out against this, we are labelled 'nasty women' and told that we have a bad attitude, that we are being hysterical, or are arrogantly told that we have misunderstood the situation.
Here, in this collection, the authors reclaim the label 'nasty woman' and wear it with pride, as should all women who are told they are wrong for challenging the status quo.
-
𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝘾𝙤𝙤𝙡 𝙂𝙞𝙧𝙡 𝙞𝙨 𝙖 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙘𝙚𝙥𝙩 𝙘𝙤𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙙 𝙞𝙣 𝙖 𝙗𝙤𝙤𝙠 𝙄'𝙫𝙚 𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙, 𝙂𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙖𝙣 𝙁𝙡𝙮𝙣𝙣'𝙨 𝙂𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙂𝙞𝙧𝙡 - 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙢𝙚 𝙛𝙖𝙢𝙞𝙡𝙞𝙖𝙧 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙩𝙝𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝 𝙛𝙚𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙥𝙤𝙥 𝙘𝙪𝙡𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙚 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜.
𝙄𝙩 𝙙𝙚𝙨𝙘𝙧𝙞𝙗𝙚𝙨 𝙖 𝙥𝙖𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙘𝙪𝙡𝙖𝙧 𝙩𝙧𝙤𝙥𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙬𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙨𝙚𝙚𝙢𝙨 𝙩𝙤 𝙚𝙭𝙞𝙨𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙛𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙨𝙞𝙧𝙚𝙨 𝙤𝙛 𝙢𝙚𝙣 ... 𝙨𝙝𝙚 𝙚𝙭𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙨 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣 𝙖 𝙨𝙚𝙩 𝙤𝙛 𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙚𝙙𝙞𝙩𝙨 𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛 𝙖𝙘𝙘𝙤𝙧𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙡𝙮.
(Kristy Diaz)
-
There were so many poignant and relatable moments within Nasty Women, that it's impossible for me to cover them all, but I do implore you to read/listen to it.
What they all have in common, though, is the message that we should take up space, be ourselves, and not feel a need to shrink ourselves or ask permission to just exist authentically. We are enough, exactly as we are. We do not need to meet some checklist of requirements, or conform to society's nonsense standards of who we should be.
-
𝙄𝙩'𝙨 𝙤𝙠 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚 '𝙪𝙣𝙘𝙤𝙤𝙡'. 𝙁𝙤𝙧𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙤𝙛 𝙘𝙤𝙤𝙡, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙤𝙛 𝙘𝙤𝙤𝙡 𝙖𝙨 𝙙𝙚𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙙 𝙗𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙮𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙚𝙡𝙨𝙚 𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙛.
-
One of the essays that spoke the most to me was The Nastiness of Survival by Mel Reeve.
Reeve honestly shares details about assault and trauma that she has experienced. It shouldn't be that women who share these honest experiences are considered brave for making themselves vulnerable, but in this rape culture and society we live in, that tends to not believe women, it is incredibly brave.
I myself have experienced abuse in the past - physical and mental - and Reeve's anger resonates with me. She articulates her feelings and views towards the responses she has received so emphatically, that I feel less alone in my own feelings about my own trauma.
Too often, people try to respond 'positively', stating that we wouldn't be the people we are today if we hadn't been through the experiences that shaped us, with my own particular favourite insult being 'we aren't given more than we can handle'.
While it's true that these experiences shape us, they also rob us of so much. We aren't victims, we are survivors, but that doesn't mean we don't wish things could have been different.
-
𝙈𝙮 𝙨𝙪𝙧𝙫𝙞𝙫𝙖𝙡 𝙞𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙖 𝙣𝙤𝙗𝙡𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙪𝙜𝙜𝙡𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙝𝙖𝙨 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙚𝙙 𝙢𝙚. 𝙄𝙩 𝙞𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙖 𝙨𝙩𝙤𝙧𝙮 𝙤𝙛 𝙧𝙚𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙥𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣, 𝙤𝙧 𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙢𝙮 𝙞𝙣𝙣𝙚𝙧 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨 ... 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚𝙨 𝙄 𝙘𝙖𝙣𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙗𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙚𝙤𝙥𝙡𝙚 𝙄 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙮 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙞𝙣 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙪𝙨𝙚, 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙢𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩, 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙄 𝙘𝙖𝙧𝙧𝙮 𝙞𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙨𝙩 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙡𝙙.
𝙄 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙚𝙣 𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙘𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙡𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙖𝙬𝙛𝙪𝙡, 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙄 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙗𝙚 𝙜𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙛𝙪𝙡 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙡 𝙙𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙡𝙤𝙥𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙄 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙝𝙖𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙪𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙪𝙧𝙫𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙞𝙩.
(Mel Reeve)
-
Another essay that felt very close to home was 'Lament; Living with the Consequences of Contraception' by Jen McGregor.
From a young age, McGregor was on the depo injection, in an effort to manage her periods and prevent unwanted pregnancy.
From a young age, I was on the contraceptive pill, in an effort to manage my periods and prevent unwanted pregnancy.
In school we were taught the fear of getting pregnant too young more than we were taught about our own bodies, or about the long-term effects/health risks of contraception.
It is only now, in my 30s, that I have been able to access resources that detail research into the effects that contraception can have on our bodies, and even this research is in the very early stages.
For McGregor, the results of being on the depo injection have been life-changing and debilitating - leaving her with brittle bones and prematurely aging her.
For me, the results have also been life-changing and debilitating, but not to such an extreme degree - I have been left with a myriad of digestive problems.
I also didn't realise how much the pill was affecting my mood until I stopped taking it, and while I respect the choices other women make for their methods of contraception, I would never go back on it.
But the fact that these stories are so common - stories of ill health due to contraception, and stories of a lack of warning and education about the risks - still raise many important questions about why women's health is still not treated as seriously as men's health.
-
𝙏𝙤 𝙨𝙤𝙡𝙫𝙚 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙨𝙚𝙩 𝙤𝙛 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙩𝙝 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙗𝙡𝙚𝙢𝙨 𝙄, 𝙞𝙣𝙖𝙙𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙩𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙡𝙮, 𝙘𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙖𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧. 𝙄 𝙙𝙞𝙙𝙣'𝙩 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙚 𝙗𝙖𝙘𝙠 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙄 𝙚𝙢𝙗𝙖𝙧𝙠𝙚𝙙 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝙟𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙣𝙚𝙮 𝙖𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙖𝙜𝙚 𝙤𝙛 18 𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙛𝙖𝙧 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙚𝙥𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙬𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙣'𝙨 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙡𝙩𝙝 𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙜𝙤. 𝙄 𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙙 𝙬𝙖𝙮
(Jen McGregor)
-
'On Naming' by Nadine Aisha Jassat (I feel like I should bold and underline Nadine here) and 'Black Feminism Online; Claiming Digital Space' by Claire Heuchan provide commentary on the experience of being deemed as somehow less important as an individual due to race, as well as gender. I cannot say I am surprised at the accounts shared by these women, but I am saddened and angered by them.
Jassat shares her experiences of having her name go unrecognised - not simply mispronounced, though this of course in itself is an act of 'othering' and can be a microaggression, but completely misread and changed based on other people's assumptions about what her name must be. The fact that people call her Nadia, based on an assumption that that must be her name, because how could Nadine and Aisha fit together naturally, sadly does not surprise me, but it does make me angry.
I myself have witnessed friends/colleagues continue to misname someone, even when they've been corrected several times. My approach to this is usually to start calling them by the wrong name, and they soon find the name isn't too hard to remember or pronounce.
But of course, people should not need 'allies' just to have their name recognised and pronounced correctly.
In a similar vein, Heuchan raises questions about digital spaces, and workplaces, where 'diversity and inclusion' seems to be the flavour of the month, but ultimately doesn't deliver.
Sadly this also is all too common. I'm tired of working for companies that claim to be inclusive, yet don't fundamentally change any of the policies or structures that enabled them to be uninclusive in the first place, thereby enabling them to continue being uninclusive, but with the front of a few token 'diverse' people thrown into the mix.
I did complete a course a few years ago, with the hope of finding a HR Diversity & Inclusion focussed job, but I myself have quickly come to realise that too often these roles are there to serve the entity as the employer, not the employees, and they don't appear to be interested in generating real institutional change.
-
𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙘𝙝𝙞𝙡𝙙𝙧𝙚𝙣 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙖𝙪𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙣𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙣𝙖𝙢𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙖 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙚𝙧 𝙬𝙝𝙤𝙨𝙚 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙠 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙮 𝙢𝙖𝙮 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙣 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬, 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙙𝙤 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙨𝙖𝙮 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙣𝙖𝙢𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙜𝙞𝙧𝙡 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙨𝙞𝙩𝙨 𝙖𝙘𝙧𝙤𝙨𝙨 𝙛𝙧𝙤𝙢 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙙𝙖𝙮 𝙞𝙣 𝙘𝙡𝙖𝙨𝙨, 𝙞𝙨 𝙖 𝙩𝙤𝙤𝙡 𝙤𝙛 𝙘𝙪𝙡𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙖𝙡 𝙞𝙢𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙞𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙢. 𝙄𝙩 𝙞𝙨 𝙖 𝙘𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙧 𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙚. 𝘼 𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙚 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙫𝙮 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙚𝙢𝙥𝙞𝙧𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙬𝙝𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙨𝙪𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙢𝙖𝙘𝙮, 𝙬𝙝𝙞𝙘𝙝 𝙨𝙖𝙮𝙨 '𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙨𝙚 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙚𝙤𝙥𝙡𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙝 ... 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙨𝙚 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙚𝙤𝙥𝙡𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙧𝙚𝙢𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙣𝙖𝙢𝙚𝙡𝙚𝙨𝙨.'
(Nadine Aisha Jassat)
-
The final element I want to touch on, is how Nasty Women challenges the preconceived notions we all have about what is right and true, based on what we have been taught.
For example, science teaches us that herbal medicines and traditional remedies should be scoffed at. But whether you believe there is benefit to these medicines or not, wise women were around long before western medicine, and in some societies and countries they continue to thrive as respected contributors to their communities.
It's not a coincidence that all 'leaders' of medicine were men, and that when these men (often from a wealthy background, but not always medically or scientifically trained) felt threatened, because wise women continued to administer to their communities despite being told that the 'new' version of medicine was better, they quickly stamped these women out with the label of witch.
In fact, it was only in 1951 that the 'crime' of witchcraft was repealed. Up to a mere 70 years ago, women were being killed as witches. We are taught plenty about modern science and medicine, but we aren't taught nearly enough about this history.
Similarly, we are challenged to break the cycle of blaming other women, and of not believing other women.
Women are not in competition for the affections of men. Women should not be asked to justify that they are inherently 'good' when something bad happens to them. Women should not be criticised for what they wear, how much they drink, how much they weigh, and how meek and mild they are.
The truth is that being perceived as 'good' is a trap. No matter how we dress, how we behave, or what we do, there will still be those who feel they can criticise us or arrogantly tell us what to do, as though they know best.
So claim your badge as a Nasty Woman, and wear it proudly. We need more Nasty Women in this world.
-
𝘼𝙣𝙮 𝙬𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙣 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙙𝙚𝙘𝙞𝙙𝙚𝙨 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙥 𝙤𝙪𝙩𝙨𝙞𝙙𝙚 𝙤𝙛 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞𝙨 𝙙𝙚𝙢𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙙 𝙤𝙛 𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙤𝙬𝙚𝙨 𝙖 𝙙𝙚𝙗𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙘𝙝𝙚𝙨, 𝙩𝙤 𝙬𝙞𝙨𝙚 𝙬𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙣, 𝙩𝙤 𝙬𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙣 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙬𝙖𝙡𝙠 𝙖𝙡𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙝𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙨.
(Alice Tarbuck)
-
I recommend Nasty Women to every single person. I think everyone should read it.
This is the first book I've come across from 404 Ink, but I will definitely be reading more from this amazing independent publisher, which seeks to promote under-represented and silenced voices.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

Given me the confidence to write my own story

I am a Nasty Woman too and after listening to this book, I couldn’t be more proud.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

Great book, definitely recommend!

A great enlightening book, definitely recommend you give this book a listen.
And a big thank you too to all the contributors to this book!❤️ I’ve not been able to stop listening.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

Diverse

I liked the fact there was a variation in narrative of the women. I liked the different stories and the common themes and the different writing styles.

A part I remember bookmarking was the British narrator, narrating Nadine's story about mispronouncing her name whilst mispronouncing her name.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

Enjoyable read.

I enjoyed dipping in to different lived experiences. I recommend traversing this collection of interesting worlds.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

Thought provoking

Love love this … strong women sharing their thoughts on all sorts of issues. Well worth a listen

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

Educational, entertaining, thought provoking....

This diverse collection of essays stayed with me long after listening. The powerful medium of story telling made it accessible and compelling, giving new ideas and perspectives that I will actively seek to educate myself about. Recommended for absolutely everyone, I chose this by chance but I am so very glad I listened, and so grateful for the women who shared, and published these stories. Excellent.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

Well written, so-so narration

Really enjoyed the content! But given the diversity in the writers that should be reflected more in the narrators.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

1 person found this helpful

Women’s Voices Can Be Heard

Superb perspectives on Intersectionality

Interesting and informative. All very relatable

Highly recommend this excellent collection from real women talking about their important personal experiences

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

compulsory read/listen

Will be revisiting this more than once. even if I thought I was open and had some understanding, this showed how ignorant I still am!

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

2 people found this helpful