The narcissist makes his companion jump through burning hoops and flames to be in a relationship with him. He constantly wants you to prove that you are good enough for his attentions and affections. He constantly thinks that he is deserving of someone much more perfect than you. If you give up all of your mystery and your secrets, he especially has reason now to discount you or throw you out.

After all, he should be with someone who is perfect. This human should have no flaws. They should have no baggage. This person is deserving of his love and attention. You shouldn't drink. You shouldn't do drugs. You should get along perfectly with all of his friends, family, and children. The girl must meet mother's approval, and she must meet the approval of the other family members.

You must dress the way he expects his partner to dress. You must act the way he expects you to act. You must provide an impeccable home for him. You must do all chores, including his chores. You must run all his errands. You must budget his money. You must pay all his bills, and pay them on time in the manner in which he would pay them.

You must do his laundry. It must be wrinkle-free and folded in a manner in which he says it should be folded. The kids must be raised in a manner that is perfectly in line with his parent's morals and values. After all, they raised a perfect child, (him). Thus, his children should be perfect, too. You must beat, discipline, or abuse them until they behave in the way that his parents abused him.

The narcissist's partner must prove herself over and over again, but she is never proving herself for anything real. The narcissist always has an out planned, so that it is available to him if ever he wants to leave the relationship. He doesn't get too attached to his partner in case he wants to leave her. If the narcissist catches wind that she might be planning to leave him first, he will initiate a breakup to preempt her. After all, he doesn’t want it to look like he was the one discarded. He wants to make it look like he was the one who discarded her.