Every time Dr. Jennie Young used Bumble or Hinge, the same thing happened: high hopes on day one, horror by day two. Then she remembered what she does for a living.

Dr. Jennie is a rhetoric professor. She spent years doing critical discourse analysis on high school disciplinary handbooks — coding for toxic, gendered language patterns hidden inside official policies. One day, she turned that same academic lens on men's dating profiles.

What she found? Thirty-three distinct rhetorical patterns. The Blue Ribbon for Bare Minimum. The Cuddle Bears. The Test-and-Apologize. Patterns that reveal — before the first date — exactly what kind of man you're dealing with.

Over 260,000 women are now using her Burned Haystack Dating Method to stop calculating and start recognizing.

In this episode, Dr. Jennie and I get into all of it — the patterns, the political landscape of dating in 2026, why women are not too picky, and what a genuinely good profile actually looks like. She also shares how she used her own method to find her partner.

You've already seen these profile patterns. This episode will help you interpret them.

If you want to build your own dating strategy from your core values — not someone else's checklist — book a relationship strategy session with me:

👉 sadecurry.com/schedule-appointment

In this episode, I break down exactly how the halo effect shows up in dating, in difficult marriages, and in divorce — and why smart, high-achieving women fall for it just as hard as anyone else. (Maybe harder. Because we're good at building convincing stories.)

A man can pay for every dinner from the first date to the wedding — and still refuse to share anything that matters once you're married. A partner can be a good provider, a good father, and a terrible spouse all at once. These things live together. Your brain doesn't want to hold that complexity. I'm going to help you do it anyway.

I also talk about the flip side — the horn effect — where one weird moment makes you write off someone who might deserve more time. The goal for evaluating a relationship is clarity, not suspicion.

Whether you're dating, inside a hard marriage, or in the middle of a divorce — the most important thing you can do right now is learn to see people as they are, not as you need them to be.

If this episode lands close to home and you want support, book a complimentary relationship strategy session with Sade. Book a strategy session ↗

In this episode of Your Extraordinary Life and Dating After Divorce Podcast, I pull back the curtain on one of the most destructive patterns I see in women who are smart, capable, and completely worn out. I share stories from my own first marriage — including the season I drove to sales calls while six months pregnant so my ex-husband could build a business he never built. I was functioning as his parent, not his partner.

This pattern doesn't disappear after divorce. It follows you into dating. It shows up when you calculate a man's schedule and decide he deserves grace for being unavailable — before he's even taken you on a date. You owe him nothing. Your job is to decide whether he fits your life, not manage the reasons he can't show up for it.

Over-responsibility creates under-responsibility — in your partner and in yourself. While you pour your energy into someone else's growth, your finances, your career, your relationships with your kids, your health — all of it sits on pause. That pause becomes years. Years become your life.

You deserve better than a life built around someone else's potential.

Ready to break this pattern for good? Schedule a relationship strategy session with Sade at sadecurry.com/schedule-appointment.