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Apocalypse Cow
- Narrated by: Steve Worsley
- Length: 8 hrs and 47 mins
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Summary
When scientists with warped imaginations accidentally unleash an experimental bioweapon that transforms Britain's animals into sneezing, bloodthirsty zombies with a penchant for pre-dinner sex with their victims, three misfits become the unlikely hope for salvation. Abattoir worker Terry Borders' love life is crippled by the stench of death that clings to his skin from his days spent slaughtering cows; teenage vegan Geldof 'Scabby' Peters alternates between scratching furiously at his rash and baiting his overbearing New Age mother; and inept journalist Lesley McBrien struggles forlornly in the shadow of her famous war correspondent father and the star journalist at the Glasgow Tribune.
When Britain begins a rapid descent into chaos and ministers cynically attempt to blame al-Qaeda, Lesley stumbles upon proof that the government is behind the outbreak. During her bumbling quest to unveil the truth, she crosses paths with Terry and Geldof, and together they set out to escape a quarantined Britain with the evidence and vital data that could unlock a cure for the virus. Standing in the way are rampaging hordes of animals, a ruthless security agent, and an army ready to shoot anybody with a case of the sniffles on the off-chance the virus has mutated.Three losers. Overwhelming odds. A single outcome: the world is screwed.
What listeners say about Apocalypse Cow
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Overall
- kmcca5
- 15-10-12
Very, very silly also very, very funny!
This is a great comedy animal zombie romp... now there’s a sentence I never thought I’d write. The audio book had me gripped from start to finish, deliciously gruesome and quick witted, I finished it within 48 hours of purchase. Looking forward to listen to more from this author and the narrator is also extremely good. Well worth a listen!
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2 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Andrew
- 07-04-13
Fantastic!
this book really does deserve its award - its alternative take on zombies with cows, is pure entertainment! A good dose of humour thrown into an exciting adventure is a brilliant read. The narration is brilliant with excellent voices and timing.
This is a must own!
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2 people found this helpful
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- Jonathan
- 09-04-19
I wanted it to be cleverer
I got this as it won some Terry Pratchett prize (it has a forward by him) and I went in to it with lots of good will. As a first novel it's fine, it has a decent story arc and the characters are distinct, but its not as clever as I wanted it to be. If you have seen Black Sheep the new Zealand 'sheep go crazy' film then you'll find little original here, except there's little humour and lots of meanness. There's rather silly xenophobia against French and Germans and all the baddies are English, all the goodies Scottish. I suppose that 30 years ago it would have been fresh take on the Guy N Smith animal horror novels, but the 'self publishing' crowd have gotten seriously good, RR Haywood, Luke Smithard have raised the standard for this kind of novel. One final hmmm moment comes at the end where we are meant to celebrate with the rather selfish journalist getting the story out, although so many people died, there's should be no happy ending with so much loss...I felt the same at the end of 2012. The performance is good though.
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Overall
- W
- 13-04-13
Well done
Exceeded my expectations for a quirky, funny novel - it made me laugh, feel a afraid, sad, disgusted and rather uncomfortable about being a meat eater. Apocalypse Cow isn't just a well-constructed comic animal zombie story, it's also thought-provoking and I wasn't expecting that. Oh and nicely paced narration too.
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4 people found this helpful
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- andrew
- 20-10-20
great listen
well thought out and good performance, it made me smile. will lookout for more of his books
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- Brian
- 11-08-16
The what could happen, when you live on an island
Good story using some prime Scottish/Glasgow landmarks. I particularly liked the veggie /non-veggie argument or banter. Good plot of what might happen if it all went wrong on our little island and how the rest of the world might treat us. At times funny and other times quite sad. Well written and read.
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- Karen
- 13-12-12
not what I expected
I thought I was going to get a funny and lighthearted zombie story, but what I got was a giant, gory, vegetarianism-inducing apocolypse. If that's your style, great, you'll enjoy and there is a bit of humor. I don't really care for zombie apocolypses, and to top if off the graphic detail included about slaughter house work really did put me off meat for a few weeks. So just go in with your eyes open.
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2 people found this helpful